This one is not for the squeamish, and was inspired by my reading a few
books which I had put off reading for over a decade....

Yea, verily, while Vrba was fighting the war against the Creeping Death,
the problem of Prince Albert became worse.  The great evil of the Creeping 
Death was defeated, and Vrba returned to the lost island of Ulithi.  But
he was weary, and stayed there, wasting his time in idle pleasures.  

The royalty of the Grey Elves had been deposed during the splitting of the
Drow: for yea, verily, many of them were turned, so the Council of Elders
was created from the Leaders of the Anti-Royals.  Many of the Royals fled 
into the Underdark.  But some stayed-of these Prince Albert was one.  His 
sorcery was great, and he was an early help in the war against the Creeping
Death.  His plan, however, was to become a great hero, and thence restore
the monarchy, with himself as King.  But Vrba became preeminent, and Prince
Albert withdrew from the war, delving deeply into dark mysteries of magic.  
He raised an army of the undead to kill Vrba-but Vrba destroyed them and 
imprisoned Prince Albert.  While Vrba was away, Prince Albert escaped.

The news reached Vrba at Ulithi.  A messenger aproached him, and told him that 
Albert was causing trouble.

"Is he hanging out with the undead again?  I told him not to get
involved in that wight supremicist stuff again, or his life would be
forfeit."

"It is worse than that, Great Vrba.  He is making artifacts of evil,
and uses orcs for servants, instead of for lunch!"

"What!  This time, he's a dead man!  What kind of artifact is he
making?"

"A ring."

"I'll cut his ring finger off, then, and fling his artifact into the
deepest pit of the ocean!"

"um, it's not on his finger, and he's got a few more rings to go with
it?"

"Well, where does he have it then?"

"It's a cock ring.  He got the infamous halfling pornographer Dildo
Daggins to make it for him, and then just enchanted it himself.  He's
even got poetry about it...

	Three rings for the Elven Kings under the sky...
	seven for my Dwarf-homes
	Nine for Mortal chicks who are pretty fly
	One for the Elf Lord on his bone
	In the land of Alfheim
	where the Grey Elves lie.
	One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them
	One Ring to bring them and in the darkness *censored* them,
	in the land of Alfheim, where Albert is alpha guy."

"What a punk!"  Vrba said.

And yeah, verily, Vrba did travel home and lop off the offending
member of Prince Albert, ring attached and all, which he flung into
the deepest depths of the ocean.  

 


Notes on Grey Elf history....

The Grey Elves were ruled by royalty until the Grey Elf civil war-which
occurred because many of the Grey Elven royalty had turned to worshipping 
Lolth.  The Royals lost the war, and were banished to the Underdark,
where they became one with the Drow.  The leaders of the Anti-Royal
faction founded the Council of Elders, who rule the Grey Elves now.  There
are still descendants of the few Royals who were not banished in Alfheim,
but they are barred from politics by law.

---
Editor's note:

In order to reconcile the Grey Elf history with that of Alfheim in
general, the tales of Vrba the Great must take place prior to the
unification of the Elven lands by Nuada Silverhand. -Pam