From: mhoye@undergrad.math.uwaterloo.ca (Mike Hoye)
Subject: Re: * Free Newsletter on Passion & Romance *
Date: Wed, 6 Dec 1995 22:28:02 GMT

[In response to a spammer who posted about an "Online Newsletter
 Dedicated to Passion & Romance"]

Already, I can hear the rasfwrj readership muttering to themselves.

"Mmmm. Dream partner."

"Mmmm. Love tips."

"Mmmm. Donuts."

Look no further. What newsletter could offer you more than you
find right here at Rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan? 

Ask yourself this. Where else would you learn of the unearthly
power of Cherry Kool-Aid? What other newsgroups could reveal
to you the sensual secrets of the garden variety badger?

Read on for Mark Loy's tender love secrets, unparalelled in any
forum. Let your imagination run wild over Hawk's Amorous Accesories,
the finest that Usenet has to offer.

For those who enjoy oils and powders, the Steeves Collection is
unmatched, promising to bring you to new heights of sensation.

Have you ever wondered what Squicking is? Only here has this missing
section of the Kama Sutra been revealed for all. 

Tired of vain, fruitless ventures like newsletters, like soc.singles?

Those days are over. Come and dip you feet in the warm waters of the
most romantic corner of the Usenet. Rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan.

The newsgroup for the true romantic connoiseur.


Listen to what this satisfied customer has to say:

>You'd think with all that I would have an actively fullfilling and
>enriching life. But, alas, you'd be as dead wrong a swallow in a trash
>compacter.  Something is missing.  Or was, until I got access to the
>Internet, Usenet, and the WWW and was able to read the wonderful rec
>groups, especially--like a bolt of lightening from your toilet
>bowl--rasfwrj.  
>
>Melvin Eugene Cudlumper (aka Mark Loy)


	There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. Testimonial from
the masses. Just one of the hundreds of satisfied customers whose
lives have been brought to a new level by the shared ideals of 
rasfwrj.

	But that's not all. Thanks to the support of men and women
like Melvin, we've been able to expand our collection to include
even more of the world's most sensuous and exotic apparel and
accessories.

	The latest and certainly one of the most intriguing 
additions to our Full Vision Video Collection stars two of our own
full-time posters in a subtle new erotic drama, in which a costume
chest lights a fierce passion that turns sinister as the costumes
play a greater and greater role in their lives. "The Hawk's Masque"
has been heralded as one of the great sexual intrigues of all time.
Don't miss this chance to own your own copy.

	As well, Full Vision is proud to introduce a newcomer to the
video scene, a fresh talent with ideas of her own. Ehloa, a recent
addition to the family, has planned a full fifty-state live tour, 
to be captured by the Full Vision cameras for your viewing pleasure.
While the itinerary hasn't been released yet, insiders have hinted
that Ehloa may sticking to small venues for better interaction with
the crowd. "She'd likely stick to smaller towns, and will definitely
be avoiding the capitals." Stay tuned for details.

	We've recently added a new branch to the Steeves Collection,
no longer limiting ourselves to the oils and powders that made the
Steeves brand famous. Our staff has created a number of fragrances
to complement our current line, and every one has met with Steeves
fullest approval. Our latest success is Fade, a cologne for men 
guaranteed to strike sparks in any encounter. In the women's line,
'Nine Moons' is guaranteed to hook that tall, dark stranger you've
been looking for...

	Rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan: The True Source for the
sensual romantic in all of us.