DC Darkfriend Social

January 14, 1995

Some else actually wrote the summary this time! Judy started it out, I followed up, and then lots of other attendees tossed in their wit and wisdome. I've attempted to combine everyone's contributions as much as possible. Be sure to take a peek at the JPEG-format group photo from this social.


Unexpected Visitors & Conspicuous Absences

Well, on Saturday Jan 14th, we in the DC area had our 20th annual Darkfriend Social. It was held at Ruby Tuesday's in the Pentagon city mall. Those in attendance were: Judy and Warder (from MD), Ivis Bohlen (from NC), Joe Morris (from VA), MPS Mike Macchione (from DE), Josh Hall (from MD?), his friend, David, Erik (still never did get your lastname! - from DC), Joel McAllister (from MS), Bill Garrett (from SG), Joe Shaw (from VA), Jason Brandt (from TX), Brad Smith (from DC), Mike Ikeda (from ?VA?), and possibly some other people. We think there were a total of 20 people at this event, and Judy's pretty sure she's forgotten someone. Math is hard, you know.

And the Surprise Mystery Guests were... Pam Korda (the FAQueen), John Novak (The humblest man on the net), Keith Casner (Nae'blis), and Hawk.

Judy adds: ok, Hawk was my .27 SMG - she does not qualify as a SMG cause she often frequents DC DFS', but everyone thought she was going to be in Florida, and her plans changed at the last minute, and she was able to attend...

Bill adds: Poor John was referred to as simply "Novak" for most of the day, while everyone else was called by first name. I'm surprised that Judy's summary included his full name, rather than just saying "Joe, Pam, Novak, Mike, etc."

Novak remarks: Like Mazrim Taim, I seem doomed to go through life with everyone referring to me simply by my last name. Even my department chair does it. My flatmate is addressed by his first name. I am summarily called upon with a harsh, "Find Novak! Send me Novak!"

Judy's Twin (the Twin of her Soul) was unable to attend and sent her belated regrets. Hohn Cho and Melissa Horn could not make it, so the long anticipated defense of Melissa's barfly title did not take place. So no one drank $37 of beer (although Ivis *did* drink $19.50 of tequila...)

Bill adds: Judy would have surpassed this herself, except she was still drunk from the night before.

Joel adds: So now is it "It's hard to get sober when you are a small forsaken"

Chad Oilcan Ba'alzamon Little-Buddy Orzel could not attend. he says he got a better offer :), but I think he was once again frightened off by Piglet...

Hot Topics of Conversation

Some hot topics of conversation were:

Items of Interest & Entertainment

Accents: Bill Garrett at this point, threw his head back, put his hand behind his head to flounce his hair and said in a great southern (and female) accent "Oh, it's just so HOT down here in Shayol Ghul". Words can't do this one justice...

Bill adds:

This came up in one of our talks about how we all had envisioned one another before actually meeting each other at the socials. Someone (John? Pam?) said s/he expected Judy to speak with a Southern accent, since she had lived in North Carolina for several years. Someone else made a comment about how interesting it would be to imagine a Very Small Forsaken speaking with a drawl. I couldn't help myself...

"Mah," I said in a sugary sweet, high-pitched voice as I patted the locks of hair at the nape of my neck, "it's juss so HAWT heah in Shay-ole Gool. Mesanna, dahlin, would you be a deah an pass me th' lemonade?"

Novak reminds us: one last time for the benefit of those not present, "Better a southern belle than a southern Bill."

Showing their True Colors

BIG NEWS! Hawk has officially been raised to the Shawl!
3 of her 4 warders were present, and in honor of the occassion, they presented Hawk with a Green Shawl. With the Tar Valon Flame on it. Although some one did comment "Is that taffeta?" and another commented "She can use it as a tablecloth". It was truly touching. All you Aes Sedai wannabees are going to be jealous at future socials. :)

Remarks Pam: Flame? I thought it was a Deadhead symbol...

Hawk adds: I thought it was a Safeway symbol.

Those wearing Black were: Ivis (has anyone ever seen her where anything other than Black? makes you wonder), Judy's Warder (this was clearly a mistake... colors are hard...), Joe Shaw (The icons made him do it), and Josh Hall. Someone claimed that someone else was wearing Black, it was just not visible, but I have blocked this from my mind.

Warders, for Sale or Rent

Judy accused Hawk of making a move on her Warder, to which she replied "No, I'm not interested. I've already got too many as it is, and I'm trying to get rid of one". Be afraid Bill, be very afraid.

Pam remarks: More than one. She tried to foist 'em all off on me at one point, saying she'll keep Russ Ennis, because he's in the UK and so she doesn't have to deal with him. I told her no thanks.

Bill adds: I think she was offering Joel to Pam. Pam didn't want him. She's a Red. Heck, sometimes it seems that _all_ women are Reds.

Novak: No, I thought Pam was a Brown, with just a tinge of Red left for Roy, so to speak.

Gluttons for PUNishment

Bill was complaining about some french fries he'd eaten recently, remarking that he could taste the Taint on them as they slid their greasy way down his throat, leaving the oily feeling of the Dark One's corruption. Hawk, who had shared those fries with him, said that she didn't taste any taint on them.

"Of course," Bill said, "that's because the male half of the One Potato is tainted while the female half isn't. You know, the two halves, Spudin and Spudar."

John added, "This means, of course, that the Eye of the World was intended to grow more pure Spudin."

Later on, Bill and Novak were talking about how long it had taken them to read LOC. Bill said it took him so-and-so calendar days to read it. Casner piped up, "Callendor days? what're those?" Novak replied, "The days which are not," as in the days you skip class/work/sleep to read the latest installment.

Math is Hard

It was proven that Math is Hard for some creatures, other than Very Small Forsakens... Converstaion as follows:
	Judy "I'm 28"

	Person: "28!?! Geez, you're *twice* as old as I am!" 

	(I shoulda balefired him right there...)

	At that point, others said "uh.... you're *fourteen*?!?"

	Person: "No, I'm 19 - Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you said
	   you were *28*!"

	Others: "Uh... she *did*. Half of that would be 14".

	Group in unison "Math *is* hard..."

	(that's ok person - I'm just glad that I'm not *really*
	twice as old as you... you really scared me)

One Big Family?

Apparently, some guy at the bar asked MPS Mike what this group was, were we a family or something--No, although that is a very scary thought. Well, then, were we a religious group?

To which Josh says "I don't know, is Jordanism a religion?" and Mike quickly came up with "we're kinda like a fan club" This man continued to watch (ogle ?) the table for a good 5-10 minutes. Josh also commented that "if we were a family, then I guess Judy would be Mom"

At one point, Hawk was crawling across a windowsill to get next to Judy. Bill called out "Hey - this is a family restaurant!" But then again, Bill was heard to say, "Green Aes Sedai like men... Green warders like men, too!" Hey, we're all pretty flexisexual here.

Oh, and not totally unexpectedly, Hawk bit Mike, MPS. Judy: Sheesh, you'd think the boy would learn. How many times can one get bitten by Hawk, before one starts staying out of biting range? Learn from your mistakes, Mike...

Mike rebuts: Except for the fact that she was biting me as per your orders. Compelling other Aes Sedai, tsk tsk tsk. If she wasn't compelled she might have stopped after the first unsuccessful attempt, but no, she had to try 3 times to bite (finally succeeding by sneaking up on me).


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Bill Garrett
garrett@cs.unc.edu