From: Duncan MacKinnon <duncan@subforce1.substance.com>
To: Michael Nelson <nelson@seahunt.imat.com>
cc: keithcla@netcom.com, rrc@myrddin.imat.com, rick@hugin.imat.com
Subject: tech support

I submit for your entertainment a more detailed analysis of the situation
encountered handling tech support. I haven't seen this in any support
primmer but them may come in useful.

ACCS:    Anal-Carotid Constriction Syndrome
BFE:     Brain Full Error
BFLNB:   Bred For Looks, Not Brains
BSD:     Brain Shipped Damaged
CCBA:    Carotid Constricted By Anus
CEC:     Consumes E. Coli
DW:      DimWit
EC:      Empty Cranium
EIE:     Excessive Inbreeding Error
FM:      Friendly Moron
FTDNF:   Family Tree Did Not Fork
FTT:     Failed Turing Test
IGD:     Inadequate Genetic Diversity
INL:     Illiterate in Native Language
KDM:     Knuckle Dragging Moron

A few more for the recommended action section of the incident report:

ANS:     Apply Natural Selection
CH:      Cull Herd
PFT:     Prune Family Tree
SGP:     Skim Gene Pool
WGOL:    Weed Garden Of Life

Duncan
duncan@substance.com