Rick Moen's .signature archive

Archivist's Note:  This archive is riddled with technical in-jokes, and 
you're on your own for most, but one should be explained:  The Usenet
group "alt.sysadmin.recovery", source of some quotations below, is also
denoted by the abbreviations "a.s.r." and "ASR", as "Scary Devil Monastery" 
(an anagram variant), and by extension as simply "The Monastery".

I've also provided explanations for some of the others.  (For the
remainder, you can figure them out with not much effort.  Or maybe 
for you they're just not funny, or You Had to Be There.)

The annotation "McQ!  (4x80)" is a nod to the McQuary Limit -- named for George 
McQuary -- the Internet-courtesy rule of thumb about .signature blocks whose 
gist is:  Kindly manage to be witty without exceeding four 80-column lines, 
or prepare to be mocked mercilessly on alt.fan.warlord and elsewhere.

Another key part of the Internet .signature block standard (for .signature 
blocks at the bottom of e-mails and Usenet netnews articles, which is what 
these are) is the required leading delimiter:  two flush-left hyphens 
followed by a space character and a hard return.  Each entry below starts 
with that delimiter.



-- 
Cheers,                                     A post is just a post
Rick Moen                                   My admin will deny.
rick@linuxmafia.com                         The usual disclaimers apply
McQ!  (4x80)                                As news spools by.

-- 
Cheers,                                  DISCLAIMER:  I didn't do it.    
Rick Moen                                You can't prove it.  Nobody
rick@linuxmafia.com                      saw me.  The sheep are lying.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                       The X11 approach to device independence is 
Rick Moen                     to treat everything like a MicroVAX on acid.
rick@linuxmafia.com            -- Don Hopkins, _The UNIX Hater's Handbook_
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                          "The only good goth is a shoggoth...."
Rick Moen                           -- Alistair J.R. Young, in r.a.sf.w.r-j
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,         (Regarding "In God we trust":)  "Don't ask me how you set the
Rick Moen       trust-level of a god."  "At a PGP signing party?"
rick@linuxmafia.com -- Per Leijonhufvud & Peter de Silva, in ASR
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,     "You have acquired a scroll entitled 'irk gleknow mizk'(n).--More--
Rick Moen    This is an IBM Manual scroll.--More__
rick@linuxmafia.com You are permanently confused." -- ADOM (a roguelike game)
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
This message falsely claims to have been scanned for viruses with F-Secure
Anti-Virus for Microsoft Exchange and to have been found clean.
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Making fun of self-promoting .signature blocks 
appended by commercial antimalware products with the effect of saying 
"Please trust me because I claim to be trustworthy.  What could possibly
go wrong?")


-- 
Cheers,          "A Discordian is a Taoist with a very strange sense of humour 
Rick Moen         and the inability to sit still."
rick@linuxmafia.com   -- Rabbi Kwan Chi Sun Lieberwitz, _Jews for Buddha Cabal_
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                      Evolution:  Life's a niche, and then you die.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,    "Not only does the English language borrow from other languages, 
Rick Moen  it sometimes chases them through dark alleys, hits them over the
rick@linuxmafia.com   head, and goes through their pockets."  -- Eddy Peter
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,   "This is mad, egotistical, sick, twisted, and stretches the bounds of
Rick Moen   good taste right off the tongue, past the uvula, and down around 
rick@linuxmafia.com      the duodenum.  It has other merits, but that should 
McQ!  (4x80)  indicate positive interest."  -- The Cube, www.forum3000.org

(Archivist's Note:  Sadly, the forum3000.org site vanished in 2002 and the
domain has hosted a commercial Japenese-language site since around 2011. 
But it was a Dadaist masterpiece, with dialogues and monologues
involving characters from reality and fiction.  The Cube was a mainframe 
computer given to making philosophical utterances.  See archive:
http://web.archive.org/web/20020413104414/http://xalton.forum2000.org:80/matrix/forum_hof_questions)


-- 
Cheers,                       "Normal?  Normal is a setting on my dryer."
Rick Moen                -- heard at BayCon 2001, http://www.baycon.org/
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                    Facta tua Restitueri ad Status Pristinus Eius.
Rick Moen                       (May your data be restored to
rick@linuxmafia.com            its original pristine condition.)
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                 Quantum materiae materietur marmota 
Rick Moen                               monax si marmota possit materiari? 
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,     "Learning Java has been a slow and tortuous process for me.  Every 
Rick Moen   few minutes, I start screaming 'No, you fools!' and have to go
rick@linuxmafia.com       read something from _Structure and Interpretation of
McQ!  (4x80)  Computer Programs_ to de-stress."   -- The Cube, www.forum3000.org

-- 
"Is it not the beauty of an asynchronous form of discussion that one can go and 
make cups of tea, floss the cat, fluff the geraniums, open the kitchen window 
and scream out it with operatic force, volume, and decorum, and then return to 
the vexed glowing letters calmer of mind and soul?" -- The Cube, forum3000.org

-- 
Cheers,                      I have a mind like a steel trap.
Rick Moen                    Rusty, and illegal in thirty-seven states.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,            "Orthodoxy is my doxy.  Heterodoxy is someone else's doxy."
Rick Moen               -- William Warburton, Bishop of Gloucester (1698-1779)
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,     "All my life, I wanted to _be_ someone.   I guess I should have
Rick Moen    been more specific."        -- Jane Wagner
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                              Yes, I _am_ an agent of Satan, 
Rick Moen                            but my duties are largely ceremonial.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,      "He was clearly a man of many qualities, even if most of them
Rick Moen    were bad ones."   -- Douglas Adams, describing Zaphod Beeblebrox
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                     "Get the facts first.  You can distort them later."
Rick Moen                                                     -- Mark Twain
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               "All persons, living and dead, are purely coincidental,
Rick Moen             and should not be construed."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                -- Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                        YOU!  Out of the gene pool.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                            "To summarize the summary of the summary:
Rick Moen                           People are a problem."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Douglas Adams
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                        "He who hesitates is frost."
Rick Moen                                                 -- Inuit proverb
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,        "Where I come from, there's nothing in the 'middle of the road'
Rick Moen       but a yellow line and dead armadillos."
rick@linuxmafia.com        -- Jim Hightower, Texas Commissioner of Agriculture
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                  "Entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem."
Rick Moen                                         -- William of Ockham (attr.) 
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  I try to be scrupulous about author
attributions, including where, as here, an author didn't exactly say the
exact phrase, but the formulation was nonetheless retroactively ettributed 
to him/her.  To be picky, this exact wording is properly credited to
Irish Franciscan philosopher John Punch, three centuries later, but the
indicated sentiment is genuinely that of English scholastic philosopher
William of Ockham, whose writings also included numerous extremely similar
sentences such as "Numquam ponenda est pluralitas sine necessitate":
Plurality must never be posited without necessity.)


-- 
"If I have seen farther than others, it is because I was standing on the
shoulders of giants." (Isaac Newton)  "If I have not seen as far as others, it
is because giants were standing on my shoulders." (Hal Abelson, quoting Jeff
Goll)  "In computer science, we stand on each other's feet." (Brian K. Reed)


-- 
Cheers,                        Open-source SourceForge retakes the lead:
Rick Moen                      http://gforge.org/  Thank you, Tim Perdue.
rick@linuxmafia.com  

(Archivist's Note:  For context, Perdue had been the original architect
of the SourceForge codebase, which was then taken proprietary by his
employer in 2002.  After he was laid off, he cleaned up the
pre-proprietary codebase and released it, as a clearly superior 
alternative, renamed to "GForge" for trademark reasons.  This .signature
of mine aimed to give Perdue's project a small mindshare boost.  Since 
that happened, the active open source version departed from the GForge
effort and is now FusionForge.  N.B.:  Timothy Dean Perdue succumbed to 
colon cancer on September 16, 2011, aged 37.)


-- 
Cheers,                   I once successfully declined a departmental retreat,
Rick Moen                 saying that on that day I planned instead to advance.
rick@linuxmafia.com                  -- Alan J. Rosenthal, in The Monastery
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               I have /usr/sbin/coffee mounted from /dev/mug right now, 
Rick Moen             and you can't have it.  Oh no, I just tried to seek past 
rick@linuxmafia.com   end-of-beverage. *sigh*  -- Graham Reed, in The Monastery
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                     Skud:     Real Programmers don't use Python.
Rick Moen                   Thorfinn: Real Programmers don't use *whitespace*.
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                      "My file system's got no nodes!"
Rick Moen                                    "How does it shell?"
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                      "vi is my shepherd; I shall not font."
rick@linuxmafia.com                               -- Psalm 0.1 beta
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                        A: No.  
Rick Moen                      Q: Should I include quotations after my reply? 
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                        
Rick Moen                         This .signature intentionally left blank.
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                    I've been suffering death by PowerPoint, recently.
Rick Moen                                                     -- Huw Davies
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                            Ceterum censeo, Caldera delenda est.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Context is the scurrilous and ultimately
unsuccessful lawsuit by The SCO Group, Inc., immediately after it
abandoned its longtime name Caldera Systems, Inc., against various 
Linux-using companies on the outrageous pretext of claiming that the
Linux kernel was not an original work but rather violated copyrights on
historical Unix, over which SCO Group né Caldera (falsely) claimed to have
ownership rights.  SCO Group later went through Chapter 11 bankruptcy,
was dismembered, and, as of this writing (2017) has substantively ceased
to exist.

The gibe in the .signature block involved parodying Cato the Elder's 
repeatedly ending speeches in the Roman Senate with the phrase 
"Ceterum censeo, Carthago delenda est", meaning "Furthermore, I 
consider that Carthage must be destroyed."  Technically, it is more 
likely Cato used the pedantically-correct-Latin variant "Ceterum censeo, 
Carthaginem esse delendam", for whatever that's worth, but the former 
and rather more sonorous rendition is how it is widely quoted.)


-- 
Cheers,              First they came for the verbs, and I said nothing, for
Rick Moen            verbing weirds language.  Then, they arrival for the nouns
rick@linuxmafia.com  and I speech nothing, for I no verbs. - Peter Ellis
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              Wall Street has all the emotional stability of a 
Rick Moen            thirteen-year-old girl.   -- Louis Rukeyser
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              When it comes time to hang the capitalists, they'll 
Rick moen            fall all over each other trying to sell us the rope.
rick@linuxmafia.com                              -- V.I. Lenin
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               Dogs may have kept us company on the hunt, but it was 
Rick Moen             the cats who insisted we invent houses and discover fire.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                    -- Khiem Tran
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                  Accordions don't play Lady of Spain;
Rick Moen                                _people_ play Lady of Spain.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                       Ah, September, when the sysadmins turn colors
Rick Moen                     and fall off the trees....
rick@linuxmafia.com                                     -- Dave Van Domelen
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                The other day, upon the stair,
Rick Moen                              I met a man who wasn't there.
rick@linuxmafia.com                    He wasn't there again today;
McQ!  (4x80)                           I think he's from the CIA.

Archivist's Note:  Nobody seems to be able to track down the exact
reference, but it's widely agreed that this jape originated in Mad magazine 
in the middle 1970s at the time of the Church Commission Congressional 
hearings into misconduct by US intelligence agencies.  As such, it's 
actually a parody of a much older & longer semi-humourous poem, "Antigonish", 
that American educator and Poet William Hughes Mearns wrote in 1899(!)
as part of an amateur dramatic production called _The Psyco-ed_ that
Mearns wrote while attending Harvard.  It probably entered the public
mainstream only after Mearns reprinted it in his _New York World_ column
in 1922.  

The above version someone's mashup of the first two lines from Mearns's
original (rewriting the first few words) with the punchline closing
couplet from Mad magazine.  Mad's version was:

There was a man upon the stair
When I looked back, he wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
I think he's from the CIA.

I confess I think the unknown reviser improved on Mad's wording.)


-- 
Cheers,                             * Contributing Editor, Linux Gazette *
Rick Moen                       -*- See the Linux Gazette in its new home: -*-
rick@linuxmafia.com                       <http://linuxgazette.net/> 
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  This .signature dates back to when SSC, Inc., the
Gazette's one-time Web host, decided it owned the periodical's name and
obliged the magazine's staff to move to a new domain hosted elsewhere.
However, please see also:
http://linuxmafia.com/~rick/faq/kicking.html#linuxgazette)


-- 
Cheers,        "A raccoon tangled with a 23,000 volt line, today.  The results
Rick Moen       blacked out 1400 homes and, of course, one raccoon."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                  -- Steel City News
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                           "This is Unix.  Stop acting so helpless."
Rick Moen                                               -- D.J. Bernstein
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Since the Dan Bernstein programmer cult seemed to
regard me as their special devil figure for several decades, because of
my posted critiques stating why I personally preferred not to use his
software, it seemed fun to rile them up by quoting the gentleman in
public.  Besides, Dan made a perfectly good and telling point, so I'm
delighted to quote him.)


-- 
Cheers,               No trees were destroyed in the sending of this message. 
Rick Moen             We do concede, though, that a large number of electrons 
rick@linuxmafia.com   were terribly inconvenienced.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               My grandparents went to a planet with no bilateral
Rick Moen             symmetry, and all I got was this lousy F-shirt.
rick@linuxmafia.com   
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                    Never criticize anybody until you have walked a mile 
Rick Moen                  in their shoes, because by that time you will be a 
rick@linuxmafia.com        mile away and have their shoes.   -- Brian Servis
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              Never anger a bard, for your name sounds funny and
Rick Moen            scans to many popular songs.
rick@linuxmafia.com                         -- Stephen Savitzky
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             "< > Kernel support for JAVA binaries (obsolete) (NEW)" 
Rick Moen                            -- Linux kernel v2.2.19 configuration
rick@linuxmafia.com 
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,            There are only 10 types of people in this world -- 
Rick Moen          those who understand binary arithmetic and those who don't.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                 There are 10 kinds of people in the world, those who 
Rick Moen               know ternary, those who don't, and those who are now 
rick@linuxmafia.com     looking for their dictionaries.  -- Ron Fabre
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,   There are 10 types of people in this world, those who know quaternary,
Rick Moen those who only recently figured out Ron Fabre's "ternary" .sig, those
McQ! (4x80)  who're completely confused, and those who hate self-referential jokes.


-- 
Cheers,              "Plus ça change...."
Rick Moen            http://linuxmafia.com/~rick/pictures/1861-versus-2004.jpeg"
rick@linuxmafia.com      P.S.:  http://www.sorryeverybody.com/gallery/1/
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note: There's an art to making comments on contemporary
politics in .signature blocks.  One wants to be oblique enough to avoid
the in-your-face effect, which is tacky and self-indulgent, and it helps
to make a good-faith effort to be at least a little amusing.  Although
Internet convention gives commenters carte blanche to use their
.signature space for personal expression, it's considered bad form to 
deliberately provoke emotional overreaction, so some restraint and
subtlety is generally advisable.)


-- 
Virtual Regards,
Rick Moen
Sysimperator, dominus regis deusque machinarum.
rick@linuxmafia.com

-- 
Cheers,                                      Hardware:  The part you kick.
Rick Moen                                    Software:  The part you boot.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                                    Ita erat quando hic adveni.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                                    Frater Magnus vos spectat.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                 Katrina's Law:  Any sufficiently advanced incompetence
Rick Moen               is indistinguishable from malice.  
rick@linuxmafia.com                           (coinage attrib. to Paul Ciszek)
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Topical to 2005's botched government response to the 
catastrophic damage Hurricane Katrina left all along the Gulf Coast from 
central Florida to Texas, but most strikingly and infamously in almost totally 
devastated New Orleans.)



-- 
Cheers,                 "Due to circumstances beyond our control, we regret to
Rick Moen               inform you that circumstances are beyond our control."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                              --Paul Benoit
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               Chip Salzenberg: "Usenet is not a right."
Rick Moen            Edward Vielmetti: "Usenet is a right, a left, a jab,
rick@linuxmafia.com                     and a sharp uppercut to the jaw.
McQ!  (4x80)                            The postman hits!  You have new mail."

-- 
Cheers,             
Rick Moen                 Support your local medical examiner:  Die strangely.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,             
Rick Moen                 "Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                   -- Elizabeth Tudor
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  How cool is it to quote, in an Internet .signature block,
one of the most legendary of ruling British monarchs, an unparalleled 
practical politician, a keen mind, and the figure who helped make the
word "Elizabethan" near-synonymous with "Golden Age"?  I do love living 
in the future.)


-- 
Cheers,                   Now, it's time to hack the real world, and let other
Rick Moen                 people write Web sites about it.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                   -- Donald B. Marti
McQ!  (4x80)
-- 
Cheers,             $n=99;sub b{"$n bottle${[s=>]}[$n==1] of beer"}
Rick Moen           print$b=b, $w=' on the wall',
rick@linuxmafia.com ",$b! Take one down, pass it around, ",b($n--),"$w! "while$n
McQ!  (4x80)                                    -- Ben Okopnik

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                            Recedite, plebes!  Gero rem Imperialem!
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                   Clamo, clamatis, omnes clamamus pro glace lactis.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                   Catapultam habeo.  Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis,
Rick Moen                 ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam. 
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                   
Rick Moen                 Tua mater tam antiquior ut linguam Latine loquatur.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                   
Rick Moen                                     Vah! Denuone Latine loquebar?
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,       A positive attitude will not solve all your problems, but it will
Rick Moen     annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. -- Herm Albright
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,       "What a pity [Standard Oil exec] H. H. Rogers's money is tainted."
Rick Moen                 -- some commentator of the day    "It's twice tainted:
rick@linuxmafia.com  'Tain't yours, and 'tain't mine."  -- Mark Twain, replying.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                   I have yet to see any problem, however complicated, 
Rick Moen                 that, when you looked at it in the right way, did 
rick@linuxmafia.com       not become still more complicated. -- Poul Anderson
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                      Always remember:  Clones are people two!
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                            The box said "Windows 95, Windows NT 
Rick Moen                          4.0, or better", so I installed Linux.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                 For good netiquette,
Rick Moen                         be wise and choose a four-line
rick@linuxmafia.com                    .sig (haiku is good).
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                        My pid is Inigo Montoya.  You kill -9    
Rick Moen                      my parent process.  Prepare to vi.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                        When encryption is outlawed,
Rick Moen                      only outlaws will xr2d3fsxd df#$%xx`
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                     The Viking's Reminder:
Rick Moen                                   Pillage first, _then_ burn.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                        The Technical Support Credo:  
Rick Moen                      Remember, there _are_ no stupid questions, 
rick@linuxmafia.com            only stupid people asking questions.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                              Linux: Good, fast, AND cheap.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                     SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM!         
Rick Moen                                   SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM!    
rick@linuxmafia.com              (_Nobody_ expects the Spammish Repetition!)
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               Everything is gone;
Rick Moen             Your life's work has been destroyed.
rick@linuxmafia.com   Squeeze trigger (yes/no)?
McQ!  (4x80)           -- David Carlson (winner, haiku error message contest)

-- 
May those that love us love us; and those that don't love us, may
God turn their hearts; and if he doesn't turn their hearts, may
he turn their ankles so we'll know them by their limping.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                 "Heedless of grammar, they all cried 'It's him!'"
Rick Moen                       -- R.H. Barham, _Misadventure at Margate_
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,   Disclaimer -- These opiini^H^H damn! ^H^H ^Q ^[ .... :w : :wq :wq!
Rick Moen ^d ^X ^? exit X Q ^C ^? :quitbye CtrlAltDel ~~q :~q logout save/quit
rick@linu :!QUIT ^[zz ^[ZZZZZZ ^vi man vi ^@ ^L ^[c ^# ^E ^X ^I ^T ?  help
xmafia.com helpquit ^D ^d !! man help ^C ^c :e! help exit ?Quit ?q CtrlShftDel 

-- 
Cheers,                             "Ceterum censeo Linux propaganda est."
Rick Moen                                        -- Seth David Schoen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               "I am the very model of a modern Unix sysadmin,
Rick Moen             I've information relevant to programs in slash usr bin,
rick@linuxmafia.com   I know the tricks of emacs and the vi bugs historical,
McQ!  (4x80)          From a to ZZ upper case, in order categorical." H. Hahn

-- 
Cheers,                    Higgledy-Piggledy / Kibo Ubiquitous, 
Rick Moen                  Greps for his name in the / Happynet spool.
rick@linuxmafia.com        Interdimensional / Cyberspace deity:
McQ!  (4x80)               Didaktyliaios / Dada is cool. -- Lewis Stiller

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                                          ROMANI, ITE DOMVM!
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                     "All power is delightful, but absolute power
Rick Moen                    is absolutely delightful."  - Kenneth Tynan
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                Linux:  It is now safe to turn on your computer.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                   The cynics among us might say:   "We laugh, 
Rick Moen                 monkeyboys -- Linux IS the mainstream UNIX now!
rick@linuxmafia.com       MuaHaHaHa!" but that would be rude. -- Jim Dennis
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,     Founding member of the Hyphenation Society, a grassroots-based, 
Rick Moen   not-for-profit, locally-owned-and-operated, cooperatively-managed,
rick@linuxmafia.com     modern-American-English-usage-improvement association.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                                        This space for rant.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              "By reading this sentence, you agree to be bound by the 
Rick Moen             terms of the Internet Protocol, version 4, or, at your 
rick@linuxmafia.com   option, any later version."  -- Seth David Schoen
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                          Ban the Bomb.  
rick@linuxmafia.com                Save the world for conventional warfare.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                            Why, yes, _of course_ I'm an elitist.   
Rick Moen                          Isn't everyone?              
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                                            Potestatem capite!
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                     Emacs is a decent operating system,
rick@linuxmafia.com           but it still lacks a good text editor.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               A host is a host, from coast to coast.
Rick Moen             And nobody talks to a host that's close,
rick@linuxmafia.com   Unless the host that isn't close is busy, hung, or dead.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                            "I'd say it's latke-esque.  Sort of like 
Rick Moen                           Kafka-esque, only less depressing."      
rick@linuxmafia.com                                 -- Deirdre Saoirse Moen
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                      Linux for Intel:  Party like it's 2037!
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Dates back to when "Intel" got assumed by default to 
mean IA32.  It turns out, all 32-bit Unixes will start having
software failures attributable to 32-bit signed integers rolling over
on Jan 19, 2038, at 3:14:07AM GMT, with a cascade of problems starting
to occur well before that.)


-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                                Bu^so^stopu min per kulero.  
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  It's an extremely colloquial phrase, rendered into
Esperanto.  If you really want to know, you can look it up.)


-- 
Cheers,        "Linux means never having to delete your love mail."
Rick Moen                                              -- Don Marti
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Smirking at the ILOVEYOU network worm for MS-Windows.)


-- 
Cheers,              "The front line of defense against such sophisticated 
Rick Moen            viruses is a continually evolving computer operating 
rick@linuxmafia.com  system that attracts the efforts of eager software
McQ!  (4x80)         developers."  -- Bill Gates         

-- 
Cheers,               It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
Rick Moen          It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
rick@            The hands acquire shaking, the shaking becomes a warning,
linuxmafia.com         It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

-- 
Cheers,   If C gives you enough rope to hang yourself, then C++ gives you enough
Rick Moen    to bind and gag your neighbourhood, rig the sails on a small ship,
rick@linuxmafia.com    and still have enough to hang yourself from the yardarm.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,      "On the face of it, Microsoft complaining about the source license 
Rick Moen    used by Linux is like the event horizon calling the kettle black."
rick@linuxmafia.com             -- Adam Barr, former Microsoft Corp. programmer
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                           Fac me cocleario vomere.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                           Never ask a sysadmin "What's up?"
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              "Not using Microsoft products is like being a non-smoker 
Rick Moen           40 or 50 years ago:  You can choose not to smoke, yourself,
rick@linuxmafia.com  but it's hard to avoid second-hand smoke."  -- M. Tiemann
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                              "Java is COBOL 2.0."
Rick Moen                                              -- Deirdre Saoirse Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                        "Censeo Toto nos in Kansa esse decisse."  
Rick Moen                                                  -- D. Gale
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                      Right to keep and bear
Rick Moen                                  Haiku shall not be abridged
rick@linuxmafia.com                           Or denied.  So there.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             "That scruffy beard... those suspenders... that smug ex-
Rick Moen           pression.... You're one of those condescending Unix users!"
rick@linuxmafia.com "Here's a nickel, kid.  Get yourself a real computer."  
McQ!  (4x80)                                            -- Dilbert

-- 
Cheers,                                Bad Unabomber!
Rick Moen                              Blowing people all to hell.
rick@linuxmafia.com                    Do you take requests?
McQ!  (4x80)   --  Unabomber Haiku Contest, CyberLaw mailing list

-- 
Cheers,                              "Open your present...."
Rick Moen                            "No, you open your present...."
rick@linuxmafia.com                  Kaczinski Christmas.
McQ!  (4x80)   --  Unabomber Haiku Contest, CyberLaw mailing list

-- 
Cheers,                   "Teach a man to make fire, and he will be warm 
Rick Moen                 for a day.  Set a man on fire, and he will be warm
rick@linuxmafia.com       for the rest of his life."   -- John A. Hrastar
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                    Long ago, there lived a creature with a 
Rick Moen                  voice like a vacuum cleaner.  We know little
rick@linuxmafia.com        about it, but we do know that it ate cats.
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                   "Look at Rick:  He has Whitfield Diffie's key  
Rick Moen                  and John Gilmore's brain."
rick@linuxmafia.com                          -- Chris di Bona 
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  It might ruin the surreal effect of that quotation
to provide context, but:  At the time, I was in a restaurant, handling 
John Gilmore's PDA for some reason, and about to drive Whitfield
Diffie's car home for him, for which reason I had Diffie's car key.)


-- 
Cheers,                   "Besides, Debian runs Web sites, Red Hat runs
Rick Moen                  Quake, and Windows runs Half-Life."
rick@linuxmafia.com                       -- Bryce Kerley (on Slashdot)
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                      "Reality is not optional."
Rick Moen                                             -- Thomas Sowell
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              "It ain't so much the things we don't know that get us
Rick Moen            in trouble.  It's the things we know that ain't so."
rick@linuxmafia.com             -- Artemus Ward (1834-67), U.S. journalist
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,     "There is hardly anything in the world that some man cannot make a 
Rick Moen   little worse and sell a little cheaper, and the people who consider
rick@linuxmafia.com  price only are this man's lawful prey." - J. Ruskin (attr.)
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                            Rehab is for quitters.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)
-- 
Cheers,                                Before enlightenment, caffeine.
Rick Moen                              After enlightenment, caffeine.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                Re-elect Gore in '08.
Rick Moen              http://www.hyperorg.com/blogger/misc/gorespeech.html
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Originally, this was the somewhat more melodic
phrase "Re-elect Gore in '04", but passage of time and loss of euphony
should not stand in the way of a good troll.  It would have been good to
find a pithy way to say "What do you mean, rigged election?  The man won
by a clear 5-4 majority!", but I think I missed my window of opportunity.)


-- 
Cheers,             We write precisely            We say exactly
Rick Moen           Since such is our habit in    How to do a thing or how
rick@linuxmafia.com Talking to machines;          Every detail works.
Excerpt from Prof. Touretzky's decss-haiku.txt @ http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~dst

(Archivist's Note:  During the Hollywood entertainment industry's
ill-starred legal effort to stamp out the open source "DeCSS" program,
written mostly by Norwegian teenager Jon Lech Johansen to decrypt the
Content Scramble System (CSS) on movie DVDs so they could be played on
open source operating systems, Prof. Touretzky was one of many public
figures who needled the Hollywood powers with the unpalatable fact that, 
in order to truly stamp out DeCSS, they'd need to convince courts to
ban it in all forms including literary variants such as his own
decss-haiku.txt, a complete description of the DeCSS algorithm written 
entirely in a series of several hundred haiku poems.  Touretsky accumulated, 
in fact, an entire gallery of similar literary implementations, pointing 
out the absurdity of the court decision decreeing that code isn't eligible
for First Amendment protection on grounds of lacking the expressive nature 
of protected speech.

Touretsky and other contributors knew that Hollywood would flinch
against trying to prosecute univesity professors for writing
poetry.  Their point about the court decision's absurdity was duly made,
and Hollywood abandoned the anti-DeCSS effort in the face of near-universal 
mockery and clever sabotage such as Internet propagation of a "decoy" DeCSS 
codebase -- an effort to draw misdirected legal threats and chew up 
Hollywood attorney billing fees -- that merely strips Cascading Style Sheets 
from HTML, but has nothing to do with the DVD Content Scramble System.)



-- 
Cheers,     Microsoft Corporation Gandhi-o-meter, revision 2001-05-03 beta01.
Rick Moen  "They ignore you." "They laugh at you." "They fight you." "You win."
rick@linuxmafia.com                       WE ARE HERE.>> ^^^^^^^^^^
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Wry comment on Microsoft Corporation's then-current
series of rather nasty comments, starting in 1998, about Linux 
and open source, against which MS alternatives the firm's usual armamentarium 
had proven ineffective.  In other words, this .signature commented on 
Microsoft's startlingly impassioned, full-on propaganda war against what at 
the time was an underfunded and almost guerrilla-like software movement.  

This .signature has been rendered pretty much just a historical artifact
by the fact that, by the late 2000s, Linux and open source in fact won, 
in the sense that they became accepted as standard infrastructure and
have a ubiquitous presence, including at Microsoft, which long ago ended
the propaganda war.  If I were to resume using this .signature, I could
certainly reasonably move the arrows to "You win", but Linux and 
open source having done so is such a "done deal" that it's no longer 
perceived as worth talking about.)


-- 
Cheers,                                     Bah humbug.  Shop late.
Rick Moen                                   Happy unChristmas. 
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  The Christmas season has bad associations for me, for
family and personal historical reasons, but the details are not at all
happy to relate, and I have no desire to rain on other people's good
cheer, so this .signature is essentially a private joke for me and
people who know me well.)


-- 
Cheers,                
Rick Moen                                           FORTH heart if honk then.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,             The genius of you Americans is that you never make 
Rick Moen           clear-cut stupid moves, only complicated stupid moves 
rick@linuxmafia.com that make us wonder at the possibility that there may be 
McQ!  (4x80)        something to them that we are missing. --Gamel Abdel Nasser

(Archivist's Note:  I feel entirely free to tell jokes at the expense of
Americans because I am one, likewise about Scandinavian ethnicity
for similar reasons.  In a corporate context, I was once advised that I 
should stop telling the joke about how my Tante Bjorg warned me to never
trust as Scandinavian -- "tante" being Norwegian for "aunt" and Bjorg
being my Norwegian-immigrant aunt's ludicrously ethnic given name -- on
grounds that someone might complain, but this is not an employment
context, nei?)


-- 
Cheers,      "Transported to a surreal landscape, a young girl kills the first
Rick Moen     woman she meets, and then teams up with three complete strangers
rick@linuxmafia.com       to kill again."  -- Rick Polito's That TV Guy column,
McQ!  (4x80)  describing the movie _The Wizard of Oz_

-- 
Cheers,           "I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate
Rick Moen         those who do.  And, for the people who like country music,
rick@linuxmafia.com         denigrate means 'put down'."      -- Bob Newhart
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                             Ever wonder why the _same people_ 
Rick Moen                           make up _all_ the conspiracy theories? 
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             You can't lick the system -- but you can certainly
Rick Moen           give it a damned good fondling....
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             "I used to be on the border of insanity.  However, due 
Rick Moen           to pressing political concerns, I recently had to invade."
rick@linuxmafia.com                        -- Kurt Montandon, in r.a.sf.w.r-j
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                     Errors have been made.  Others will be blamed.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,    "Cthulhu loves me, this I know; because the High Priests tell me so!
Rick Moen   He won't eat me, no, not yet.  He's my Elder God, dank and wet!"
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                     Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Best       "In coming here today, you demonstrate, together with many others
Regards,   who did not come, that the people truly desire peace and oppose
Rick M.    violence.  Violence erodes the basis of Israeli democracy.  It must
           be condemned and isolated." -- Yitzhak Rabin, 4 Nov 95 (last speech)

(Archivist's Note:  In case the supreme irony is lost on people, it helps 
to be aware that Prime Minister Rabin was murdered a few seconds after he made
that statement.)


-- 
Cheers,       "There's a sucker born every minute.  eBay is the delivery room."
Rick Moen                                                  -- David Crowe
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,     "In 1993, the World-Wide Web was an infosystem based on hypertext.
Rick Moen    In 1994, the World-Wide Web was an infosystem based on hype."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Lars Aronsson
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             The shortest distance between two puns is a straightline.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                    Remember:  The day after tomorrow is the third day
Rick Moen                  of the rest of your life.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                                     Age, baro, fac ut gaudeam.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             "Don't use Outlook.  Outlook is really just a security
Rick Moen            hole with a small e-mail client attached to it."
rick@linuxmafia.com                        -- Brian Trosko in r.a.sf.w.r-j
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
<BLINK>Resize your browser so the following line touches both margins!</BLINK>
                           <HR WIDTH="75%">
                Best Regards, Rick Moen, rick@linuxmafia.com

-- 
Cheers,           find / -user your -name base -print | xargs chown us:us
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                         kill -9 them all.               
Rick Moen                                       Let init sort it out.           
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                    "Send a policeman, and have it arrested."
Rick Moen                     -- Otto von Bismarck, when asked what he 
rick@linuxmafia.com               would do if the British Army landed.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,   The difference between common sense and paranoia is that common sense
Rick Moen     is thinking everyone is out to get you.  That's normal; they are.
rick@linuxmafia.com      Paranoia is thinking they're conspiring.  -- J. Kegler
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                Emacs is a good operating system, but I prefer Linux.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Hi! I'm a .signature virus! Copy me into your ~/.signature  to help me spread.
Hi!p I'm a .signature spread virus! Copy into your ~/.signature to help me
Hilp I'm .sign turepread virus! into your ~/.signature! help me! Copy
Help I'm traped in your ~/signature help me!       -- Joe Slater

-- 
Cheers,                              "Azathoth need not be present to win."
Rick Moen                                       -- Charles O. Baucum, Jr.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               "We're sorry; you have reached an imaginary number.
Rick Moen             Please rotate your 'phone ninety degrees and try again."
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                             Live Faust, die Jung.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,            "Please return all dogmas to their orthodox positions."
Rick Moen                                 -- Brad Johnson, in r.a.sf.w.r-j
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,   "Why is the alphabet in that order?  Is it because of that song?"
Rick Moen                                              -- Steven Wright
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             Paranoia is the delusion that your enemies are organised.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              A good man has few enemies; a ruthless man has none.
Rick Moen                                       
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               "That article and its poster have been cancelled." 
Rick Moen                   -- David B. O'Donnel, sysadmin for America Online
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,      English is essentially Pictish that was attacked out of nowhere by
Rick Moen    Angles cohabiting with Teutons who were done in by a drunk bunch of
rick@linux   Vikings masquerading as Frenchmen who insisted they spoke Latin and
mafia.com    Greek but lacked the Arabic in which to convey that. -- Bill Hammel

(Archivist's note:  I have to say, as a Viking-descendant who grew up speaking 
British English, and has a fascination with history and languages, that 
Mr. Hammel's pithy summary of my native language's origins is spot-on correct.

The .signature lacked room to say so, but this is yet another entry from 
John Cowan's Essentialist Explanations page.)


-- 
Cheers,              Your eyes are weary from staring at the CRT. You feel 
Rick Moen            sleepy.  Notice how restful it is to watch the cursor 
rick@linuxmafia.com  blink.  Close your eyes. The opinions stated above are 
McQ!  (4x80)         yours. You cannot imagine why you ever felt otherwise.

-- 
Cheers,                  Higgeldy Piggeldy             "Phooey on Freud and his
Rick Moen                Hamlet of Elsinore            Psychoanalysis --
rick@linuxmafia.com      Ruffled the critics by        Oedipus, Schmoedipus, 
McQ!  (4x80)             Dropping this bomb:           I just loved Mom."       


-- 
Cheers,           A mosquito cried out in pain:       The cause of his sorrow
Rick Moen         "A chemist has poisoned my brain!"  Was para-dichloro
rick@linuxmafia.com                                   Diphenyltrichloroethane.
McQ!  (4x80)

Archivist's Note:  para-dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane is the insecticide 
better known as "DDT".


-- 
Cheers,              Reality and I had a fundamental difference of opinion. 
Rick Moen            We're currently undergoing a trial separation.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,           "I've seen Sun monitors on fire off the side of the multimedia
Rick Moen           lab.  I've seen NTU lights glitter in the dark near the Mail
rick@linuxmafia.com  Gate.  All these things will be lost in time, like the root
McQ!  (4x80)      partition last week.  Time to die..." -- Peter Gutmann, a.s.r.

-- 
Cheers,      "I prefer to think of 'fax' as a shortening of 'fac simile sed 
Rick Moen    longe', a Latin command meaning 'make it the same, only far away.'"
rick@linuxmafia.com                                    -- Ed Hopkins
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             "Yes, we will want simultaneous translators.... No, not when
Rick Moen           the PM meets the leaders of the English-speaking nations....
rick@linuxmafia.com Yes, the English-speaking nations can be said to include the
McQ!  (4x80)        United States."    -- Bernard Wooley, "Yes, Prime Minister"

-- 
Cheers,         "So, how are things at the Campaign for Freedom of Information?"
Rick Moen       "Sorry, I can't talk about that."
rick@linuxmafia.com        -- Sir Humphrey and Sir Arnold, "Yes, Prime Minister"
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                           Moebius strip for sale. See other side.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                         .sig fault
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             "The seminar on Spam Canceling has been canceled again.  The
Rick Moen           person who supposedly canceled it says it wasn't him." 
rick@linuxmafia.com Znqr Lbhybbx, Usenet Cabal J.D. Falk jdfalk@cybernothing.org
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,      "Cron's disease: Symptoms include an obsessive-compulsive behaviour
Rick Moen     at regular intervals throughout the day, week, or month." 
rick@linuxmafia.com    -- Clinton A. Pierce, in the scary devil monastery
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,      "Curiosity is the very basis of education and if you tell me 
Rick Moen    that curiosity killed the cat, I say only that the cat died nobly."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                   -- Arnold Edinborough
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
"Phnglui mgwlnafth Cthulhu rlyey wghnagl fthagn."    "In his flat in Bromley,
drunk Cthulhu waits knitting?  I think a few subtle typos may have crept into 
that one."   "That explains why this shoggoth I summoned is only 3mm tall."  
McQ!                       -- Peter da Silva and Peter Gutmann, in The Monastery

-- 
Cheers,             "I can see an opening for the Four Lusers of the Apocalypse:
Rick Moen           'I didn't change anything', 'My e-mail doesn't work', 
rick@linuxmafia.com 'I can't print', and 'Is the network broken?'"
McQ!  (4x80)      -- Paul McAuley <pmcauley@iol.ie> in the scary devil monastery

-- 
Cheers,              "I'd hate to have a Peugeot 404.  I can just see it now... 
Rick Moen            I'd park it somewhere, then never find it again." 
rick@linuxmafia.com              - Kirrily 'Skud' Robert <skud@infotrope.net>
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Superpolylogarithmic subexponential functions! / Faster than a polylog but slow-
er than exponential. / Even though they're hard to say, they're truly quintess-
ential. / Superpolylogarithmic subexponential functions! / Um diddle diddle did-
dle, um diddle ay! / Um diddle diddle diddle, um diddle ay!  -John S. Novak, III

(Archivist's Note:  See, that qualifies as not merely complying with
the McQuary limit, but doing so ostentatiously, don't ch'a think?)


-- 
Cheers,       I've been given a revelation by my e-mail spelling checker, which,
Rick Moen     when I wrote "fundies," suggested that I really meant "fun dies." 
rick@linuxmafia.com                                                -- Estron
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              "If these walls could talk... they'd probably say 'No! 
Rick Moen            Not the nails again!  Not the hammer!  NOT THE HAMMER!!!!'"
rick@linuxmafia.com                                -- Jennifer A. Ford
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,  "I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone
Rick Moen  has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top." 
rick@linuxmafia.com                        -- English Professor, Ohio University
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
"As someone here (I forget who) said, little incidents like this are expected.  
If you have a group 'alt.fan.red-things', it's inevitable someone will show up 
and say 'red things suck'."   "THINGS TO DO: newgroup alt.fan.vacuum-pumps" 
McQ!  (4x80)              -- Richard Boye' and Alistair J.R. Young, in rasfwrj

-- 
Cheers,                 "The American Republic will endure, until politicians 
Rick Moen               realize they can bribe the people with their own money."
rick@linuxmafia.com                               -- Alexis de Tocqueville
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,          "You know, I've gone to a lot of psychics, and they've told me
Rick Moen        a lot of different things, but not one of them has ever told me
rick@linuxmafia.com     'You are an undercover policewoman, here to arrest me.'"
McQ!  (4x80)                             -- New York City undercover policewoman

-- 
Cheers,        "History doesn't always repeat itself. Sometimes it just screams,
Rick Moen      'Why don't you listen to me?' and lets fly with a big stick." 
rick@linuxmafia.com                               --John W. Campbell Jr.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
"The Web brings people together because no matter what kind of a twisted
sexual mutant you happen to be, you've got millions of pals out there.
Type in 'Find people that have sex with goats that are on fire' and the
computer will say, 'Specify type of goat.'"            -- Rich Jeni

-- 
Cheers, "Your program just attempted an illegal instruction.  No worries, mate."
Rick Moen                         -- Australian error messages, #14 in a series
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              "Here, sanity ... niiiiiice sanity, come to daddy ... okay,
Rick Moen            that's a good sanity ... {*THWONK!*}  _Got_ the bastard." 
rick@linuxmafia.com                       -- Anthony de Boer, in The Monastery
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,            If men are from Mars and women are from Venus, there's going
Rick Moen          to be one big-ass fight over where to set the thermostat.
rick@linuxmafia.com                       -- Jim Rosenberg, in The Monastery
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Haiku are "IP";                       Permission's hereby
Keen Unixes are, too.  GNU            Granted to deal in this poem
Is better, and free.                  Without restriction.
                           -- Seth David Schoen


-- 
Cheers,               This .sig inspected by:  
Rick Moen             09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               This .sig inspected by:  
Rick Moen             13,256,278,887,989,457,651,018,865,901,401,704,640 
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Concerning the prior two entries, please see
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/AACS_encryption_key_controversy.  I was one of many
people posting that key all over the Internet, thumbing my nose at the 
notion that it could be suppressed into non-existence on the Internet 
through litigation and the threat of additional litigation.)


-- 
Cheers,               "I want you to remember just one question, and this is it:
Rick Moen             Graduates, what would you do with your life if you knew 
rick@linuxmafia.com   you could not fail?"         -- Sen. Jackie Speier, in
McQ!  (4x80)          http://www.sfsu.edu/~news/2006/spring/comm06.htm#address

(Archivist's Note:  Longtime reformist politician Jackie Speier is one
of my personal heroes, and among other challenges she's lived through
was shot five times by People's Temple staff in the same attack that
murdered her boss, my then-Congressman Leo J. Ryan.)


-- 
Cheers,                   "Of course, NIMBYism is perfectly fine for other
Rick Moen                 places, but we certainly shouldn't allow it in
rick@linuxmafia.com       _our_ town."   -- Rick M., going meta on his $SPOUSE
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                    English is essentially a bizarre dialect of Chinese,
Rick Moen                  pronounced entirely in the first tone.
rick@linuxmafia.com         --John Cowan, vrici.lojban.org/~cowan/essential.html
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                  English is essentially Anglo-Saxon with 
Rick Moen                all the cool bits taken out. 
rick@linuxmafia.com      --Thomas Leigh, vrici.lojban.org/~cowan/essential.html
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                 English is essentially an imprecise dialect of Java,
Rick Moen               without the object orientation.
rick@linuxmafia.com     --Julian Morrison, vrici.lojban.org/~cowan/essential.html
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              English is essentially Plattdeutsch as spoken 
Rick Moen            by a Frisian pretending to be French.
rick@linuxmafia.com  -- Andreas Johansson, vrici.lojban.org/~cowan/essential.html
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,        English is essentially what happens when you can't decide whether
Rick Moen      the Greeks or the Romans had the better civilization, so you ask 
rick@linuxmafia.com    everybody they ever beat up on to sort it out.
McQ!  (4x80)           -- John M. Ford, vrici.lojban.org/~cowan/essential.html

-- 
Cheers,                English is essentially a language in which "up" has 
Rick Moen              forty-seven dictionary definitions, but 
rick@linuxmafia.com    antidisestablishmentarianism is considered a "hard word."
McQ!  (4x80)           -- John M. Ford, vrici.lojban.org/~cowan/essential.html

-- 
Cheers,                English is essentially a text parser's way of getting 
Rick Moen              faster processors built.
rick@linuxmafia.com    -- John M. Ford, vrici.lojban.org/~cowan/essential.html
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
"Zees American words are too much.      Zen our culture you'll wrench; 
With 'le parking' 'le weekend' & such.  Wiz our children we'll be out of touch."
Eef you anglicize French,                -- L'Academie Francaise in a nutshell
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                            To you, this thought         Alot
Rick Moen                          I gently allot:              Isnot
rick@linuxmafia.com                                             Aword.
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Your font is:      Proportional  Monospaced
                                      ^
Matt McIrvin's amazing Font-o-Meter!  

(Archivist's Note:  E-mail and Usenet netnews are best composed and 
read in ASCII plaintext with monospaced typefaces for a large number of 
reasons, but corporate types and new-to-the-Internet kiddies who never want to
change their MUAs' defaults and think "rich text" is a good idea
famously don't agree, so the above gently plays with the perceptions of
both camps.  Note that for this Web page presentation, you will be
seeing the monospaced rendition because of <pre></pre> HTML tags.)


-- 
Cheers,                     Peter G. Neumann:  "Mars has been a tough target."
Rick Moen                   Harlan Rosenthal:  "That's because the Martians keep
rick@linuxmafia.com         shooting things down."   RISKS Digest, v. 20, #59&60
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                              Mia kusenveturilo estas plena da angiloj.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                 Harahefet sh'eli mele'ah betzlofahim.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                              Tá m'árthach foluaineach lán d'eascanna.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                                      Luftputebåten min er full av ål.
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  All four are translations of a rather famous phrase
from a Monty Python skit about translation -- in, respectively, Esperanto, 
Hebrew (עִבְרִית), Gaelic (Gaeilge), and Norwegian (Norsk).)


-- 
Cheers,                                     Ceci n'est pas une pipe:   |
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com 
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  It's a Unix joke, and also a René Magritte joke.)


-- 
Cheers,                            EMACS May Alienate Clients and Supporters
Rick Moen
rick@linuxmafia.com 
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              But then voting season comes, and reminds you that all 
Rick Moen            those Americans that are individually sane and normal tend
rick@linuxmafia.com  to be collectively crazy and very odd. -- Linus Torvalds
      http://torvalds-family.blogspot.com/2008/10/stranger-in-strange-land.html

-- 
Cheers,      "The market can stay irrational longer than you can stay solvent."
Rick Moen                                       --- John Maynard Keynes (attr.)
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                  "My generals are always right about other people's 
Rick Moen                wars and wrong about our own."  -- LBJ
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                "You do not examine legislation in light of the benefits 
Rick Moen              it will convey if properly administered, but in light of 
rick@linuxmafia.com    the wrongs it would do and the harms it would cause if 
McQ!  (4x80)           improperly administered."  -- LBJ


-- 
Cheers,                "I'm sorry Dan, what's right isn't always popular, 
Rick Moen              and what's popular isn't always right."
rick@linuxmafia.com                     -- George R. Moscone, Nov. 27, 1978
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  These were the last words of San Francisco Mayor
George Moscone, just before he was murdered by Supervisor Dan White.  
I had been a volunteer campaign worker in Mayor Moscone's campaign
-- and also for my congressman, Leo J. Ryan, likewise assassinated near
Jonestown, Guyana by People's Temple staff, shortly before Moscone's murder.

For whatever it's worth, the context of Mayor Moscone's remark is that
Dan White had, four days earlier, in a rage over establishment of a rehab
centre that White opposed and Supervisor Harvey Milk supported, impulsively 
resigned his office as Supervisor, and was now pleading with Mayor Moscone 
to reinstate him.  Moscone, considering White a problematic person and 
quietly satisifed to see him go, was trying to let White down gently and 
say "no" politely.  So, White murdered Moscone, and then murdered Supervisor 
Milk as well.)


-- 
Cheers,              "There once was a man from Nantucket,
Rick Moen            who lost his .sig in a bucket.
rick@linuxmafia.com  Five lines was too long, / columns 80 just strong,
McQ!  (4x80)         so he didn't know where to tuck it."  -- alt.fan.warlord

-- 
Cheers,              Crypto lets someone say "Hi! I absolutely definitely have 
Rick Moen            a name somewhat like the name of a large familiar 
rick@linuxmafia.com  organization, and I'd like to steal your data!" and lots 
McQ!  (4x80)         of users will say "OK, fine, whatever."    -- John Levine 


-- 
Cheers,              Híggledy-pìggledy / XML programmers
Rick Moen            Try to escape those / I-eighteen-N woes;
rick@linuxmafia.com  Incontrovertibly / What we need more of is
McQ!  (4x80)         Unicode weenies and / François Yergeaus.

(Archivist's Note: This was one of John Cowan's contributions
to a 2002 limerick contest on the xml-dev mailing list, John having decided
to go on beyond limericks.  Notice that it includes a number of
characters properly renderable only with UTF-8.  This .signature is one
reason I gave up on trying to serve up a non-HTML-wrapped version of
this .signatures archive, as I had no luck at all getting my Web server
to correctly serve up an ASCII text file that includes UTF-8
characters.)


-- 
Cheers,                      Notice:  The value of your Hofstadter's Constant 
Rick Moen                    (the average amount of time you spend each month 
rick@linuxmafia.com          thinking about Hofstadter's Constant) has just 
McQ!  (4x80)                 been adjusted upwards.


-- 
Cheers,                 They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care;
Rick Moen               They pursued it with forks and hope;
rick@linuxmafia.com     They threatened its life with a railway-share;
McQ!  (4x80)            They charmed it with smiles and soap.

(Archivist's Note:  It's from Lewis Carroll's narrative nonsense poem "The
Hunting of the Snark (An Agony in 8 Fits)" -- the famous couplets announcing 
the beginning of the hunt.)


-- 
Rick Moen         There was an old man             Said with a laugh, "I 
rick@linuxmafia   From Peru, whose lim'ricks all   Cut them in half, the pay is 
           .com   Looked like haiku.  He           Much better for two." 
                                                        --Emmet O'Brien 

-- 
Rick Moen              "The Internet sees your competence and wisdom as damage, 
rick@linuxmafia.com    and will route around it."  -- Anil Dash
McQ!  (4x80)           http://twitter.com/anildash/status/2897466042

(Archivist's Note:  Dash deftly parodies, here, a famous saying by
the late and much lamented John Perry Barlow, one of the founders and
guiding spirits of the Electronic Frontier Foundation:  "The Internet treats
censorship as a malfunction [RM: commonly misquoted as "damage"] and routes 
around it.")


-- 
Rick Moen            Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean
rick@linuxmafia.com  to stand by the president or any other public official.
McQ!  (4x80)                                           -- Theodore Roosevelt

-- 
Rick Moen                           "The plural of 'Pokemon' is 'vermin.'"
rick@linuxmafia.com                                    -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen                    "Names of fictional places are capitalized: 
rick@linuxmafia.com          Narnia, Oz, San Francisco, etc."
McQ!  (4x80)                                         -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "Use 'login' for the noun, 'log in' for the action, 
rick@linuxmafia.com    and 'Loggins' when you're footloose in the danger zone."
McQ!  (4x80)                                         -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "Use 'verbal' to compare words with some other form of 
rick@linuxmafia.com    communication ('poor verbal skills'), use 'oral' to be 
McQ!  (4x80)           more popular."                      -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "Use the inverted pyramid structure for your story, 
rick@linuxmafia.com    as this pleases Apophis, the Egyptian god of darkness 
McQ!  (4x80)           and chaos."                        -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "Robots should be referred to only by gender-neutral 
rick@linuxmafia.com    pronouns, no matter how sexy they may be."
McQ!  (4x80)                                   -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "'Lego' is the plural.  There is no singular, because 
rick@linuxmafia.com    what the hell can you do with only one of them?"
McQ!  (4x80)                                   -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "The seemingly odd usage of 'ironic' in Ms. Morissette's
rick@linuxmafia.com    song is due to errors during translation from the 
McQ!  (4x80)           original Canadian."               -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "Use 'quirky' to describe potentially dangerous crazy 
rick@linuxmafia.com    people that you don't want to upset."               
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                  "Always remember to close all parentheses.  We're 
rick@linuxmafia.com        not paying to air-condition the entire paragraph."  
McQ!  (4x80)                                             -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                            "If accuracy / Is what you crave / 
rick@linuxmafia.com                  Then you should call it / Myanmar Shave."  
McQ!  (4x80)                                               -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "Always capitalize 'Satan'. You don't want to get dead
rick@linuxmafia.com    goats from those people."           -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen             "The correct spelling is 'Mr. T.'  People who type out 
rick@linuxmafia.com   'Mister' are fools to be pitied."              
McQ!  (4x80)                                         -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen             "While it's tempting to call them 'baristi' because of 
rick@linuxmafia.com   the Italian roots, the plural of 'barista' is 
McQ!  (4x80)          'journalism majors.'"              -- @FakeAPStylebook


-- 
Rick Moen             "'Among' if you're in normal society; 'amongst' if you're
rick@linuxmafia.com   in a period drama made by the BBC."    -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen             "If you start a sentence with an action, place the actor 
rick@linuxmafia.com   immediately after, or you will anger Christian Bale."    
McQ!  (4x80)                                               -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen             "The plural of Blackberry is 'Blackberries.'  The plural 
rick@linuxmafia.com   of Blackberry users is 'Dingleberries.'"
McQ!  (4x80)                                               -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                  "The numbers one through ten should be spelled out,
rick@linuxmafia.com        while numbers greater than ten are products of the 
McQ!  (4x80)               Illuminati and should be avoided."
                                                           -- @FakeAPStylebook
-- 
Rick Moen            "Take note; the semicolon is never to be used correctly."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                         -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Rick Moen                  "The rules for numbers below ten do not apply to 6.
rick@linuxmafia.com        He is not a number, he is a free man."
McQ!  (4x80)                                          -- @FakeAPStylebook

(Archivist's Note:  Fans of Patrick McGoohan's "The Prisoner" will get
this joke.)


-- 
Rick Moen            "Commas are probably the most misunderstood of all 
rick@linuxmafia.com  punctuation.  They frequently dress in black, listen 
McQ!  (4x80)         to sad music, and cut themselves."   -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen             "Avoid using 'decimate', as someone will pipe up about it
rick@linuxmafia.com   meaning 'remove 1/10th of', and those people are dicks."
McQ!  (4x80)                                               -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen            "Do not abbreviate 'Maine'.  They will call the newsroom 
rick@linuxmafia.com  and whine in that ridiculous fake accent of theirs."
McQ!  (4x80)                                          -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                  "To make 'pants' singular, use a pair of scissors."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                         -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen                    "People who spell 'voila' as 'viola' should be
rick@linuxmafia.com          responded to with voilence."   -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen            "For the titles of most compositions, use quotation marks.
rick@linuxmafia.com  If Bob Fosse is involved, use jazz hands." 
McQ!  (4x80)                                               -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen            "A 'homonym' is a nym attracted to nyms of the same sex."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                        -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen             "The phrase 'sources high in the administration' can give 
rick@linuxmafia.com   unintended connotations, depending on your readership."
McQ!  (4x80)                                               -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen            "Infinitives may be split only after extensive counseling,
rick@linuxmafia.com  and a trial separation."              -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen                               "We believe you mean 'dundant', ma'am."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                        -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen               "Due to circumstances beyond your control,
rick@linuxmafia.com     you are captain of your fate, and master of your soul."
McQ!  (4x80)                                           -- Ashleigh Brilliant

-- 
Rick Moen                         "The word 'totally' is redundant except when
rick@linuxmafia.com               describing how rad something is."
McQ!  (4x80)                                           -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                 "Do not bracket nonrestrictive phrases with commas.
rick@linuxmafia.com       Nonrestrictive phrases yearn to be free and feel the 
McQ!  (4x80)              wind in their hair."              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                 "Do not confuse 'lyme disease' with 'lime disease', 
rick@linuxmafia.com       an affliction caused by over-consumption of mojitos."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "Having the right word is much more satisfying than just 
rick@linuxmafia.com    sleeping around with any old word that comes along."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "Answer rhetorical questions. They act like they don't 
rick@linuxmafia.com    need one, but, deep down, they do."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook


-- 
Rick Moen               "And you say, 'Just a moment, I've almost finished 
rick@linuxmafia.com     _If on a Winter's Night a Traveler_ by Italo Calvino.'"
McQ!  (4x80)               -- Italo Calvino, _If on a Winter's Night a Traveler_

-- 
Rick Moen            "Columbus, too, thought he was a flop, probably, when they 
rick@linuxmafia.com  sent him back in chains.  Which didn't prove there was no 
McQ!  (4x80)         America."  -- Saul Bellow, _The Adventures of Augie March_

-- 
Rick Moen                       "This is the difference between this and that."
rick@linuxmafia.com                  -- Gertrude Stein, _A Novel of Thank You_
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen            this way this way this way this way this way this way this
rick@linuxmafia.com                      way out this
McQ!  (4x80)                                way out
                                               O      -- Ronald Sukenick, _Out_

(Archivist's Note:  Above four .signature blocks quote the closing lines 
of the respective famous novels cited.)


-- 
Rick Moen                       "Fine.  The use of the passive-aggressive voice 
rick@linuxmafia.com             is to be discouraged.  Whatever, MAN."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                    "Passive voice is used when the receiver of an 
rick@linuxmafia.com          action is more important than the performer.  Ex:  
McQ!  (4x80)                 Your mom was banged."        -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen               "Use standard abbreviations for foreign money:  EUR for
rick@linuxmafia.com     euros, AUD for Australian dollars, CBP for Canadian
McQ!  (4x80)            beaver pelts, etc."             -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen               "Only three living individuals are addressed as 'the':
rick@linuxmafia.com     the Batman, the Doctor, and the Erik Estrada."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen               "For 1-5 pizza boxes, use the suffix -heap.  For 6-10,
rick@linuxmafia.com     use -henge.  10+ pizza boxes is a pizziggurat."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen               "References to online retailer Amazon.com should always
rick@linuxmafia.com     include '.com' even though they actually make money."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                                "The suffix '-bate' means 'to lessen.' 
rick@linuxmafia.com                      Yeah, we were surprised, too."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                           Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in 
rick@linuxmafia.com                 rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem.
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen                                 Caesar si viveret, ad remum dareris.
rick@linuxmafia.com 
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen                          Nihil curo de ista tua stulta superstitione.
rick@linuxmafia.com 
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen               "Avoid using foreign-language phrases in your articles, 
rick@linuxmafia.com     unless they have a certain je ne sais quoi."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                        "When attributing a quotation to Paris Hilton, 
rick@linuxmafia.com              the preferred term is 'blame'."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                   "The word 'axiomatic' is George Will's thing, and 
rick@linuxmafia.com         he will straight up cut you, if you try to use it."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                  "Remind testy sources they shouldn't pick fights 
rick@linuxmafia.com        with someone who buys ink by the barrel, by throwing 
McQ!  (4x80)               barrels of ink at them."        -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                          "Use 'Holy Grail' for the cup of Christ and
rick@linuxmafia.com                'holey Grail' for the strainer of Christ."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                      "A superscript is a script that was rocketed to 
rick@linuxmafia.com            Earth as an infant from its doomed homeworld."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                   "It is important to close all parentheses.  We've 
rick@linuxmafia.com         all been trapped in a Mike Royko aside since 1978."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Cheers,                                          I don't have a solution, but I 
Rick Moen                                        certainly admire the problem.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Ashleigh Brilliant
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                            To whom it may concern: you 
Rick Moen                                          are a very special person. 
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Ashleigh Brilliant
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
The sight of his guests filled Lord Cray / At breakfast with horrid dismay, 
So he launched off the spoons  / The pits from his prunes 
At their heads as they neared the buffet.             -- Edward Gorey
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                               If God had approved of the metric system,
Rick Moen                             he'd have given us ten fingers. 
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Ashleigh Brilliant
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                            Living on earth may be expensive, but it 
Rick Moen                          includes an annual free trip around the sun.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Ashleigh Brilliant
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                    My sources are unreliable, but their
Rick Moen                                  information is fascinating.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Ashleigh Brilliant
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                         All I want is a warm bed and a 
Rick Moen                                       kind word, and unlimited power.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Ashleigh Brilliant
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              <SomeLamer> what's the difference between chattr and chmod?
Rick Moen            <SomeGuru>  SomeLamer: man chattr > 1; man chmod > 2;
rick@linuxmafia.com              diff -u 1 2 | less
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                                    Debian - even Hell freezes faster 
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                      Welcome to our special issue on violence in the
Rick Moen                    workplace..., I mean system administration. 
rick@linuxmafia.com                      -- Don Marti, Linux Journal, Dec. 2000
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                      
Rick Moen               There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast. 
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                     #ifdef NOT_A_GODDAMN_YANK
Rick Moen                   { 0x10, "Minimise Delay" }, #else
rick@linuxmafia.com         { 0x10, "Minimize Delay" }, #endif /* ipchains.c */
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen                "Never substitute a slash for a solidus. 
rick@linuxmafia.com      You don't want to get letters from Victorian bankers."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen           Well, my terminal's locked up, and I ain't got any mail,
rick@linuxmafia.com And I can't recall the last time my program didn't fail;
McQ!  (4x80)        I've got stacks in my structs, I've got arrays in my queues,
                    I've got the:  Segmentation violation -- Core dumped blues.

-- 
Rick Moen                "Do not use the phrase 'Jungian archetype' outside of 
rick@linuxmafia.com      restaurant reviews."          -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)        

-- 
Rick Moen                "Subjects and verbs should always agree, even if 
rick@linuxmafia.com      they just agree to disagree."     -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)
                    
-- 
Rick Moen                "Starting every sentence in your health story about 
rick@linuxmafia.com      conjunctivitis with a conjunction is what they call 
McQ!  (4x80)             poeticism."     -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                     "When referring to Spider-Man, 'Web head' can now 
rick@linuxmafia.com           be written as 'webhead'."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                        "Do not be afraid to use exclamation points 
rick@linuxmafia.com              in your writing.  They can sense fear."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen               "It is no longer necessary to write new stories
rick@linuxmafia.com     about Facebook privacy issues; just change the dates."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen               "Use quotation marks for all direct quotes, unless you 
rick@linuxmafia.com     are some kind of fancy pants, Mr. Cormac McCarthy."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                     "'Pop Tarts' is a trademark, and should not 
rick@linuxmafia.com           be used to describe generic products such as 
McQ!  (4x80)                  Taylor Swift or Miley Cyrus."  -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                               "In stories about pirates, remember the 
rick@linuxmafia.com                     adjectival form is 'piradical'."  
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                                                "Omt ndlss vwls."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                      -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)        

-- 
Rick Moen                         "ATM machine (n):  Machine that makes ATMs."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                      -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)        

-- 
Rick Moen                "Imperial units should be used only when measuring
rick@linuxmafia.com      general levels of rebel scum."   -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)        

-- 
Rick Moen               "The four seasons are Spring, Summer, Winter and Fall. 
rick@linuxmafia.com     For California publications, change to Mudslide, 
McQ!  (4x80)            Hillfire, Flood, and Earthquake."    -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen              "An easy way that you can save space is to edit out the 
rick@linuxmafia.com    overused word 'that.'  That's just not a word that needs 
McQ!  (4x80)           that much use."                       -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen                     "In stories about anti-war protests, distinguish 
rick@linuxmafia.com           participants who love peace from those who are 
McQ!  (4x80)                  just big Mercedes fans."      -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen                     "Use 'bologna' for the meat, 'baloney' for
rick@linuxmafia.com           anything creationists say."   -- @FakeAPStylebook 
McQ!  (4x80)                  

-- 
Rick Moen             "'Horrible tragedy':  Use this phrasing to differentiate 
rick@linuxmafia.com   the described event from hilarious tragedies."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen            "Avoid dangling participles unless referring to James Bond,
rick@linuxmafia.com  in which case dangle them over shark tanks or fire pits."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen               "Throw small projectiles at your copy editor now and 
rick@linuxmafia.com     then.  A jumpy copy editor is an accurate copy editor."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Cheers,        "One of the reasons it takes such a long time to make a picture 
Rick Moen      like 'Jaws' is because it's not the time it takes to take the 
rick@linux     take that takes the time; it's the time it takes between takes 
mafia.com      that takes the time that takes the takes."      -- Roy Scheider

-- 
Rick Moen                      "'Rape' is a green, leafy vegetable, similar to 
rick@linuxmafia.com            lettuce.  'Child molestation', however, is not."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen               "Do not refer to inhabitants of Lesbos as 'Lesbians',
rick@linuxmafia.com     even if they did experiment that one time in college."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen            "When asking paranormal experts for verifiable evidence, 
rick@linuxmafia.com  also wish for a flying pony, because hey, you never know."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen              "A co-dependent clause will stay with a main clause long 
rick@linuxmafia.com    beyond the point that it's healthy for either of them."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen           "pay wall - Method used by newspapers and other publications
rick@linuxmafia.com to keep online readership down to low, manageable levels."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen              "It is perfectly acceptable to split an infinitive,
rick@linuxmafia.com    especially if you haven't brought enough for everybody."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen                      "The correct plural forms are as follows:
rick@linuxmafia.com            surgeons general, brothers-in-law, Spiders-Man."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 


-- 
Rick Moen                                "You can never go home again, Oatman, 
rick@linuxmafia.com                      but I guess you can shop there." 
McQ!  (4x80)                             -- Martin Blank, "Grosse Pointe Blank"

(Archivist's Note:  In this black-comedy movie, the protagonist has returned
to his hometown after many years, to attend his first-ever high school 
reunion.  He says the quoted lines to his psychiatrist's answering machine, 
upon discovering that his childhood home is now a mini-market.)


-- 
Rick Moen             "peasant - Seen as derogatory. Don't use in relation to 
rick@linuxmafia.com   farm laborers.  OK for third-shift copy editors, though."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen               "Never diagram a sentence when under the influence of 
rick@linuxmafia.com     alcohol or strong narcotics, even if it IS hilarious."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen            "Do not simply write that an official is laying 'in state.'
rick@linuxmafia.com  Be specific: What kind of state? Death? Arousal? Kentucky?"
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen                          "Do not use square brackets unless 
rick@linuxmafia.com                you're writing about Pat Boone or Al Gore."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen                 "It's too bad that everyone who has a solution for 
rick@linuxmafia.com        everything is at home commenting on the Internet."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @kellyoxford

-- 
Rick Moen                       "Shakira molests air and calls it dancing."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                         -- @kellyoxford
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen                   "A photograph is worth more than a thousand words. 
rick@linuxmafia.com         Especially a photograph of at least 1001 words."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @FakeAPStylebook 

-- 
Rick Moen                                   "The Tea Party is to politics what 
rick@linuxmafia.com                         'Jersey Shore' is to television."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @kellyoxford

-- 
Rick Moen                                "I'm pretty sure the Mayans just got
rick@linuxmafia.com                      tired of writing that calendar."
McQ!  (4x80)                                              -- @kellyoxford

-- 
Rick Moen                 "Told my friend she shouldn't smoke weed while she's 
rick@linuxmafia.com       pregnant because her baby's never going to want to 
McQ!  (4x80)              come out."                   -- @kellyoxford


-- 
Rick Moen                       "No hay mayor desprecio que no hacer aprecio."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                        -- Spanish proverb
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  "The worst sin is to pay no attention."  In other
words, the most effective way to repond to someone's display of anger is to
display little reaction, or outright indifference.  Freely interpreting:
"Don't feed the troll.")


-- 
Rick Moen                                   We Await Silent Tristero's Empire.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                        
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  If you don't get that one, your life needs more
Thomas Pynchon in it.)


-- 
Rick Moen                           "I've been to Alaska, it was like a long 
rick@linuxmafia.com                 'Home Improvement' episode with taxidermy."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                 -- @kellyoxford

-- 
Rick Moen                           "I'm not a cynic:  I'm a hypocrite.
rick@linuxmafia.com                 Hypocrites believe in something."
McQ!  (4x80)                         -- Roy Zimmerman, "Creation Science 101"
                                    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uIwiPsgRrOs

-- 
Rick Moen                     "The race is not to the swift, nor the battle
rick@linuxmafia.com           to the strong..., but that's the way to bet."  
McQ!  (4x80)                  -- Damon Runyon, riffing off Ecclesiastes 9:11

-- 
Rick Moen                "Top tip:  Pay for your homeopathic medicine with a 
rick@linuxmafia.com      glass of water that's had a $100 note dipped into it."
McQ!  (4x80)                                               -- Josh Price

-- 
Rick Moen                  "If a guy says, 'I feel like I've known you forever' 
rick@linuxmafia.com        on a first date, it means he's never talked to a 
McQ!  (4x80)               woman for that long before."      -- @kellyoxford

--
Rick Moen                  "'Lego'" is the plural.  The singular is 'Legum'."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen                  "You can stop running that response to Virginia's 
rick@linuxmafia.com        letter about Santa.  She's probably dead by now."
McQ!  (4x80)                                           -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                    "So, this SEO copywriter walks into a bar, grill, 
rick@linuxmafia.com          pub, public house, Irish bar, bartender, drinks, 
McQ!  (4x80)                 beer, wine, liquor."          -- Michael Karlsson

-- 
Rick Moen                    "Celebrities promoting alt-med therapies should 
rick@linuxmafia.com          be listed in descending order of deaths caused."
McQ!  (4x80)                                               -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                 "Has Google looked at the appropriateness of indexing 
rick@linuxmafia.com       #WikiLeaks?  The answer is yes, and we decided to 
McQ!  (4x80)              continue.  Because it's legal."       -- Eric Schmidt

-- 
Rick Moen                          "'Decimate' when referring to killing one 
rick@linuxmafia.com                in ten.  'Octomate' when referring to the 
McQ!  (4x80)                       cephalopod dating site."  -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Rick Moen                 "War is God's way of teaching Americans geography."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                   -- Ambrose Bierce (attr.)
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Rick Moen                                               Remember Thor Five!
rick@linuxmafia.com                                   
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  This was a rallying cry in James Blish's award-winning 
science-fiction series of novels _Cities in Flight_.)


-- 
Rick Moen              "I once requested an urgent admission for a homeopath, 
rick@linuxmafia.com    who had become depressed and taken a massive underdose."
McQ!  (4x80)                                           -- Dr. Phil Peverley 


-- 
Rick Moen              "It may be necessary to explain to your younger readers 
rick@linuxmafia.com    that Mubarak is not a Pokemon."
McQ!  (4x80)                                           -- @FakeAPStylebook

(Archivist's Note to posterity:  Above was topical in the year 2011.)


-- 
Rick Moen                        "A shprakh iz a dialekt mit an armey un flot."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                -- Max Weinreich, linguist
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note to the Yiddish-challenged:  "A language is a dialect
with an army and a navy."  Weinreich was raised in Russian-ruled Latvia,
where he founded the YIVO Institute for Jewish Research, one of the 
bastions of the Yiddish language, in 1925.  He fled the outbreak of WWII
and re-founded YIVO in New York City during the war.)


-- 
Rick Moen               "If you watch Black Swan backwards, it's a movie about 
rick@linuxmafia.com     a psychotic girl who benefits from ballet therapy."
McQ!  (4x80)                                           -- @knnth_dh

-- 
Rick Moen                    ("Personal to sci-fi fans: If '2001' is _Analog_, 
rick@linuxmafia.com          'Tron: Legacy' is _Thrilling Wonder Stories_.)
McQ!  (4x80)                           -- Roger Ebert's review of Tron: Legacy

-- 
Rick Moen            "Julianne Moore probably took the role of Sarah Palin 
rick@linuxmafia.com  because actors win awards for playing handicapped people."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @kellyoxford


-- 
Rick Moen          "What's the use of a good quotation if you can't change it?"
rick@linuxmafia.com  	                                   -- The Doctor
McQ!  (4x80) 

(Archivist's Note:  Colin Baker's Sixth Doctor said this in the
serial The "Two Doctors" (1985).  As one of many fannish in-jokes, Baker
says this same line once again, but substituting "quote" [sic] for
"quotation", in 2013's 50th anniversary special "The Five(ish) Doctors
Reboot".)


-- 
Rick Moen               The Doctor:  "I feel disoriented."
rick@linuxmafia.com     Sarah Jane Smith:  "This is the disorientation centre."
McQ!  (4x80)            The Doctor:  "That makes sense."

-- 
Rick Moen                  "No.  'Eureka' is Greek for 'This bath is too hot.'"
rick@linuxmafia.com                                     -- The Doctor
McQ!  (4x80) 

-- 
Rick Moen             "Gosh that takes me back... or is it forward?
rick@linuxmafia.com   That's the trouble with time travel - you never can tell."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                  -- The Doctor

-- 
Rick Moen            Vila:  "Why don't you go?" Avon:  "_You_ are expendable."
rick@linuxmafia.com  Vila:  "And you're not?"   Avon:  "No, I am not.
McQ!  (4x80)         I am not expendable, I'm not stupid, and I'm not going."
                                                         -- Blake's 7

-- 
Rick Moen   "There are three states of legality in Irish law.  There is all this
rick@linux  stuff that comes under 'That's grand', then it moves into 'Ah, now
mafia.com   don't push it', and finally it comes under 'Right, now you're takin
McQ! (4x80) the piss', and that's when the police come in."    -- Dara O'Briain 

-- 
Rick Moen                 "They say men can never experience the pain of 
rick@linuxmafia.com       childbirth.  But they can, if you hit them in the 
McQ!  (4x80)              goolies with a cricket bat for 14 hours." -- Jo Brand

-- 
Rick Moen           "Old professors never die, they just lose their faculties."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                            -- Stephen Fry 
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             "This is the first time in my lifetime that Irish people are
Rick Moen           able to go 'What?  You're going to England?  It's full of 
rick@linuxmafia.com terrorists.  Come to Ireland.  We've no terrorists at all.  
McQ! (4x80)         They're all playwrights, now.'"    -- Dara O'Briain 

-- 
Cheers,                              "I installed a skylight in my apartment.
Rick Moen                            The people who live above me are furious."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                            -- Steven Wright
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                      "On American pronunciation:  You say erbs and we 
Rick Moen                    say herbs.  Because, you know, there's an H in it."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                             -- Eddie Izzard
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                              "Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. 
Rick Moen                            Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                             -- Peter Kay
McQ!  (4x80)

- 
Cheers,                                "People say 'Bill, are you an optimist?' 
Rick Moen                              And I say, 'I hope so.'"
rick@linuxmafia.com                                             -- Bill Bailey
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                "The first thing I do in the morning
Rick Moen                              is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                           -- Dorothy Parker 
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,       "Please proofread your feature titles.  We don't need more letters
Rick Moen     from people reminding us that Mothra's Day isn't until August."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,            "Conjoined sentences have two or more clauses.  Once popular
Rick Moen          sideshow attractions, modern surgery has made them rare."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,        "You're not cleared for that information, Friend Citizen. 
Rick Moen      (Remember:  Rumors are treason, and make the Computer UnHappy.")
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Paranoia
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note: Recurring saying from the role-playing game Paranoia,
set in a future distopian underground city ruled by an insane
all-powerful computer, in which much surreal humour occurs because the 
players are charged with hunting down and killing mutants and
participants in conspiracies, though everyone is a mutant and
conspirator.)


-- 
Cheers,      "If you play a Ke$ha song backwards, you hear messages from Satan.
Rick Moen    Even worse, if you play it forwards, you hear Ke$ha."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                      -- Lord_Voldemort7 
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                         "Typographers will tell you to eliminate widows 
Rick Moen                       and orphans.  Typographers are MONSTERS."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             "Misplaced modifiers are always in the last place you look."
Rick Moen                                                 -- @FakeAPStylebook
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                               ["Exit, pursued by a bear."]
Rick Moen                             -- The Winter's Tale, Act III, Scene III
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Yes, really.  That's Shakespeare's actual stage direction, 
surely one of the most famously odd ones in any play, ever.)


-- 
Cheers,                         Q: Why did Douglas Hofstadter cross the road?
Rick Moen                       A: To make this joke possible.
rick@linuxmafia.com  
McQ!  (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  If you don't know why Douglas Hofstadter has a close 
personal relationship with the subjects of recursion and self-reference, you 
need to read more Douglas Hofstadter, starting with _Godel, Escher, Bach: An 
Eternal Golden Braid_ and continuing with _Metamagical Themas_, _The Mind's I_,
and other groundbreaking and stimulating works.  Remember also
Hofstadter's Constant, which is the amount of time you spend each month
thinking about Hofstadter's Constant.  I've just adjusted yours upwards
-- for the second time, if you're reading this file consecutively.)


-- 
Cheers,           "Now, at this point, I should have remembered that profound
Rick Moen         truism:  'Some people, when confronted with a Unix problem,
rick@linuxmafia.  think, "I know, I'll use sed."  Now, they have two problems.'"
com  McQ!  (4x80)       -- Jamie Zawinski, Unix-Haters mailing list, 1992-12-12

-- 
Cheers,                        "When closing parentheses, it's polite to post 
Rick Moen                      a sign saying when they will reopen."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                     -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80) 

-- 
Cheers,                                  "Junk science, n.:  genital studies."
Rick Moen                                                  -- @FakeAPStyleBook
rick@linuxmafia.  
com  McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                "Never bury the lede.  Cremation is the 
Rick Moen                              only way to make sure it's really dead."
rick@linuxmafia.                                            -- @FakeAPStyleBook
com  McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                        "Any claim that includes a requirement that you 
Rick Moen                      have to really, really believe for it to work is
rick@linuxmafia.               essentially unfalsifiable."    -- Rebecca Wolfe
com  McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Rick Moen                                  "So as not to offend readers, use 
rick@linuxmafia.com                        'the N-word' instead of 'Nebraska'."
McQ!  (4x80)                                                -- @FakeAPStylebook

-- 
Cheers,                                   "I am not now, nor have I ever been, 
Rick Moen                                 a member of the demigodic party."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                        -- Dennis Ritchie
McQ!  (4x80)   

-- 
Cheers,                           "Unless you're doing a story on the Muppets, 
Rick Moen                         you are not a gonzo journalist."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                        "Science editors:  There are no such things as 
Rick Moen                      'indigo children.'  The correct term is 'Jedi'."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                       Every time you make a typo, the errorists win.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen                   "So, every time a new iPhone's about to come out,
rick@linuxmafia.com         one will get left in a bar?  Apple's like a clumsy,
McQ!  (4x80)                alcoholic Easter Bunny."             -- Rex Huppke

(Archivist's Note:  Topical to 2010-11, when this happened twice.)


-- 
Cheers,                             "Do not forget the extra 'r' in Febuarry."
Rick Moen                                                  -- @FakeAPStylebook
rick@linuxmafia.com 
McQ!  (4x80)          

-- 
Cheers,                         "Valentine's Day (Feb. 14) should not be 
Rick Moen                       confused with Vanhalentine's Day (every day)."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                  -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)          

-- 
Cheers,                      Remember: "its" means "it is", and "it's"
Rick Moen                    is the possessive form of "it".                    
rick@linuxmafia.com                                  -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)     

-- 
Cheers,                      "Hungry: wanting food.  Hungary: European country.
Rick Moen                    Hung Gary: Works in classifieds, gentlemen." 
rick@linuxmafia.com                                  -- @FakeAPStylebook
McQ!  (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                        "Debian ist ein Textadventure."
Rick Moen                                                    -- Klaus Knopper
rick@linuxmafia.com                          
McQ!  (4x80)        

-- 
Cheers,             "money, n., life-giving elixir of politics.  syn, speech.  
Rick Moen           Ex:  When the Supreme Court equated campaign spending with 
rick@linuxmafia.com   free speech, I asked my boss to lend me a million verbs."
McQ!  (4x80)                                  http://campaignenglish.com/

-- 
Cheers,                         Saturday night in Toledo, Ohio
Rick Moen                       Is like being nowhere at all.
rick@linuxmafia.com             All through the day as the hours rush by
youtube.com/watch?v=XZUGSSYlPYI You sit in the park and you watch the grass die.

-- 
Cheers,                      "Overheard a hipster say 'Quinoa is kind of 2011',
Rick Moen                    so I lit his beard on fire."      -- @kellyoxford
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ!  (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,    The society that tolerates shoddiness in philosophy because it is an
Rick Moen  exalted profession, and scorns excellence in plumbing because it is a
rick@linuxmafia.com      lowly profession, will have neither good philosophy nor
McQ! (4x80)  good plumbing.  Neither its pipes nor its theories will hold water.

(Archivist's Note:  From _Excellence:  Can We Be Equal and Excellent
Too?_ (1961), by the late educator John W. Gardner.  Regrettably, that
4x80 .signature lacked sufficient space for the attribution.  Yes, I 
really do stay under the McQuary Limit, each time, every time.)


-- 
Cheers,      Nothing's hotter than having a copyeditor correct your sex scenes.
Rick Moen                                                       -- Max Barry
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             A programmer had a problem.  He thought to himself, "I know,
Rick Moen           I'll solve it with threads!".  has Now problems. two he
rick@linuxmafia.com                                        -- Davidlohr Bueso 
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                        WebMD is like a Choose Your Own Adventure book
Rick Moen                      where the ending is always cancer.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                        -- @kellyoxford
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                               "Everybody lives, Rose!  Just this once,
Rick Moen                             everybody lives!"
rick@linuxmafia.com                         -- The Doctor, "The Doctor Dances" 
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             A: Yes.
Rick Moen           > Q: Are you sure?
rick@linuxmafia     >> A: Because it reverses the logical flow of conversation.
.com McQ! (4x80)    >>> Q: Why is top posting frowned upon?

-- 
Cheers,                                  Actually, time flies hate a banana. 
Rick Moen                                                    -- Micah Joel
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)  

-- 
Cheers,                    Foursquare is for people who wish they were Sims.
Rick Moen                                                    -- @kellyoxford
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)  

-- 
Cheers,                 Some people, when confronted with a problem, think,
Rick Moen               "I know, I'll use Dvorak!"  Now they have k,s rosnpdm;e
rick@linuxmafia.com                                   -- Colter Reed
McQ! (4x80)  

-- 
Cheers,                          My daughter is invited to a samba party. I was 
Rick Moen                        excited, thought it was a sysadmin party. 
rick@linuxmafia.com              Turns out it's something to do with dancing :-/
McQ! (4x80)                                                  -- Martin Bateman


-- 
Cheers,                "Two women walk into a bar and discuss the Bechdel Test."
Rick Moen                                      -- Matt Watson (@biorhythmist)
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)       

(Archivist's Note:  The Bechdel Test is my very favourite example of
non-rhetoric rhetoric, the art of articulating a telling argument in such a 
way that it is winningly and drastically undersold, hence all the more 
effective for ostentatiously NOT beating people over the head with one's point 
-- though I've been known to produce the occasional modest example.)


-- 
Cheers,                "Girl, are you a model?  Because you could totally be an 
Rick Moen              idealized sample representation of a real-world object."
rick@linuxmafia.com                             -- Matt Watson (@biorhythmist)
McQ! (4x80)       

-- 
Cheers,                                           "I love stateless systems." 
Rick Moen                                         "Don't they have drawbacks?" 
rick@linuxmafia.com                               "Don't what have drawbacks?"
McQ! (4x80)                                                   -- Sam Hughes

-- 
Cheers,                 Snowden is accused of giving information to "the enemy".
Rick Moen               He gave information to the American people.  Well, now
rick@linuxmafia.com     we know who the enemy is.             --- Steven Brust
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,    Being die-hard loyal to a company is like being in an intimate rela-
Rick Moen  tionship with a brick.  The brick cares nothing for you.  The brick 
rick@linux will only cause you pain when it forgets about you.  The brick serves
mafia.com  only its interests, and nothing else is of consequence.  --Mackieman


-- 
Cheers,                             If you're going to play the game properly, 
Rick Moen                           you'd better know every rule.
rick@linuxmafia.com                           -- Rep. Barbara Jordan (D-Texas)
McQ! (4x80)

(Archivist's note:  Barbara Charline Jordan was another of my personal heroes.  
See https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barbara_Jordan for her story.)


-- 
Cheers,                HULK LIKE OXFORD COMMA VERY MUCH.  HULK WANT TO DATE, 
Rick Moen              BUT OXFORD COMMA GO OUT ONLY IN GROUPS OF THREE OR MORE. 
rick@linuxmafia.com                             -- @EditorHulk
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,        HULK LIKE TO REMIND EVERYONE THAT "FEWER" MEAN YOU CAN COUNT IT, 
Rick Moen      "LESS" MEAN MUST BE MEASURED.  FEWER MISTAKES MEAN LESS SMASH! 
rick@linuxmafia.com                                  -- @EditorHulk
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             And we all know the saying, which is true as well as witty,
Rick Moen           that a camel is a horse that was designed by a committee.  
rick@linuxmafia.com                -- Allan Sherman, "Peter and the Commissar"
McQ! (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,          Controversy is dreaded only by the advocates of error.
Rick Moen                                         -- Benjamin Rush
rick@linuxmafia.com 

(Archivist's Note:  Dr. Rush of Philadelphia, a physician, polymath
reformer in many areas of science and politics, creator of the entire 
field of humane treatment of the mentally ill, one of the USA's Founding
Fathers, Pennsylvania representative to the Continental Congress, and
signer of the Declaration of Independence, was a distant (maternal)
ancestor of mine.  In one famous incident -- somewhat poignantly -- he
jumped heroically into attempting to halt Philadelphia's Yellow Fever
Epidemic of 1793, working multiple days on-end without sleep to apply
the best treatments then known to science, treating as many as 100
patients per day: bloodletting, purging, mercury rubs, cold baths, etc.
-- probably thereby killing more patients than the virus did.  Because,
sadly, it was 1793, and to be a physician was to be a relentlessly
optimistic agent of good health for others, who in truth mostly killed
his patients.

Until the late 1800s, even a brilliant and energetic physician like Dr.
Rush was sadly much, much more likely to kill you than help you --
speaking of error -- for lack of any understanding of the "germ" basis
of most disease, or even of disease vectors.  The 1793 epidemic, for
example, was halted only when autumn frost killed the local Aedes
aegypti mosquito population.  Both the exhausted Dr. Rush and everyone
else of that era had no more idea why the epidemic stopped than why it
started.)


-- 
Cheers,              When _Guns of the South_ came out, it was sometimes shelved
Rick Moen            with the history books, but only south of the Mason-Dixon 
rick@linuxmafia.com  Line.  I couldn't make that up.  Fiction has to be 
                     plausible.  History just has to happen. -- Harry Turtledove

-- 
Cheers,                    Cuius testiculos habes, habeas cardia et cerebellum.
Rick Moen                                     -- Terry Pratchett, _Small Gods_
rick@linuxmafia.com  

-- 
Cheers,                       Do not believe you'll get the chance to choose.
Rick Moen                     Regret, by definition, comes too late;
rick@linuxmafia.com           Say what you mean.  Bear witness.  Iterate.
McQ! (4x80)                          Sonnet:  Against Entropy, John M. Ford

-- 
Cheers,                          "Don't worry, your password has forgotten you,
Rick Moen                        too.  It's moved on.  It's stronger, now."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                   @daniel_barker 
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                           "So, a Degas painting walks into a barre...."
Rick Moen                                                 @behindyourback
rick@linuxmafia.com                                    
McQ! (4x80)      

-- 
Cheers,                     Every developer's hunt for the best editor ends up 
Rick Moen                   with vim, emacs, or a management position.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                    -- Rolf Bjaanes
McQ! (4x80)       

-- 
Cheers,           Day 4278 of my caffeine LD50 field test experiment.  Eyeballs
Rick Moen         are vibrating.  Can hear colors.  Caught a hummingbird.
rick@linuxmafia.com                             -- Matt Watson (@biorhythmist)
McQ! (4x80)      

-- 
Cheers,                      Where my codependents at?
Rick Moen                    (seriously, I've been texting you for 3 hours wtf)
rick@linuxmafia.com                             -- Matt Watson (@biorhythmist)
McQ! (4x80)       

-- 
Cheers,                                     A Spanish todo list has everything.
Rick Moen                                       -- Matt Watson (@biorhythmist)
rick@linuxmafia.com                             
McQ! (4x80) 

-- 
Cheers,              "I know you believe you understood what you think I said,
Rick Moen            but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not
rick@linuxmafia.com  what I meant."         -- S.I. Hayakawa
McQ! (4x80) 

-- 
Cheers,                                 Atque memento, nulli adsunt Romanorum 
Rick Moen                               qui locutionem tuam corrigant.
rick@linuxmafia.com 
McQ! (4x80) 

-- 
Cheers,                         Sane, paululum linguae Latinae dico.  Id legi 
Rick Moen                       modo hic modo illic.  Vero, Latine loqui non 
rick@linuxmafia.com             est difficilissimum.  Lingua speciem involutam 
McQ! (4x80)                     praebet, sed sat cito eam comprehendes.

-- 
Cheers,                  "You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season
Rick Moen                in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your 
rick@linuxmafia.com      body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance."
McQ! (4x80)                                           -- Edward Flaherty 


-- 
Cheers,                     "Two things programmers tend to underestimate:
Rick Moen                   1.  How long things take.
rick@linuxmafia.com         2.  How long our code will be around.
McQ! (4x80)                 3.  How many things we underestimate." @jasongorman

--
Cheers,               « D'où vient qu'un boiteux ne nous irrite pas, et qu'un
Rick Moen             esprit boiteux nous irrite?  A cause qu'un boiteux
rick@linuxmafia.com   reconnaît que nous allons droit, et qu'un esprit boiteux
McQ! (4x80)           dit que c'est nous qui boitons. »  -- Pascal, Penées

-- 
Cheers,               « Il n'est si homme de bien, qu'il mette à l'examen
Rick Moen             des loi toutes ses actions et pensées, qui ne soit 
rick@linuxmafia.com   pendable dix fois en sa vie. » 
McQ! (4x80)                               -- Michel de Montaigne, Essais

-- 
Cheers,          I'm ashamed at how often I use a thesaurus.  I mean bashful. 
Rick Moen        Embarrassed!  Wait--humiliated.  Repentant.  Chagrined!  Sh*t!
rick@linuxmafia.com                                        -- @cinemasins
McQ! (4x80)        

-- 
Cheers,                        "The boisterous sea of liberty indeed is never
Rick Moen                      without a wave."
rick@linuxmafia.com                           -- Jefferson to Lafayette, 1820
McQ! (4x80)        


-- 
Cheers,                             "When the facts change, I change my mind. 
Rick Moen                           What do you do, sir?"
rick@linuxmafia.com                           -- John Maynard Keynes (attr.),
McQ! (4x80)                                      responding to a critic

(Archivist's Note:  It's a colourful story, but not credible, as Keynes was
known for being even-tempered with even the most annoying and obtuse
interlocutor.  A similar story is told of Mohandas Gandhi replying to a 
critic who accused him of inconsistency with a position he'd articulated 
previously:  "But I have learned since then!")


-- 
Cheers,                      C.S. Lewis fan:  "I'd like to visit Narnia." 
Rick Moen                    Tolkien fan:  "I'd like to live in Middle-Earth."
rick@linuxmafia.com          George R.R. Martin fan:  "Nope, I'm good."
McQ! (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Also heard with Lovecraft fandom as the punchline.)


-- 
Cheers,                      "The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, 
Rick Moen                    but that the lightning ain't distributed right."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                           -- Mark Twain
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                               "I don't need to test my programs. 
Rick Moen                             I have an error-correcting modem."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                         -- Om I. Baud
McQ! (4x80)                           https://thc.org/root/phun/unmaintain.html

-- 
Cheers,                                  A fronte praecipitium a tergo lupi.
Rick Moen                                (a precipice in front, wolves behind)
rick@linuxmafia.com                                         -- Roman saying 
McQ! (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                                       If life keeps giving you melons,
Rick Moen                                     you just might be dyslexic.
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Play on the cloyingly optimistic American saying
"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.")


-- 
Cheers,                   You can't make anyone see reason. All you can do is 
Rick Moen                 throw a big party around reason and see who shows up.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                          -- @alexandraerin
McQ! (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                        "NOLI TIMERE MESSOREM"
Rick Moen                      -- motto on Sir Terry Pratchett's coat of arms
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Beloved fantasy author Terry Pratchett was knighted, to 
his special pleasure, during the initial phases of his decline from an unusual
form of Alzheimer's Disease.  Possibly because one of his most famous 
characters is an anthropomorphic personification of Death, his heraldic motto
is the Latin for "Don't Fear the Reaper."

He was knighted at the beginning of 2009, almost a year to the day after
being diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer's Disease following a minor
stroke, which is perhaps why death -- and Death -- were then particularly 
on his mind.

Sir Terry died of his disease on 2 March 2015, aged 66, having just
finished his 41st Discworld novel, leaving behind a staggeringly
successful record of over 85 million books sold worldwide in 37
languages, many scores of novels in multiple genres, short stories,
plays, non-fiction articles, essays, poetry, television feature films,
role-playing games, video games, and board games -- and also leaving
behind unfinished major chunks of 10 other novel-length works and
"fragments from many other bits and pieces".  Such a full life, such
grace under adversity, and such a gift to the world.  Ave, Sir Terry.)


-- 
Cheers,                              Arrq uryc qrpelcgvat EBG13?  Nfx zr ubj!
Rick Moen                      
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  This is ROT13 for "Need help decoding ROT13?
Ask me how!")


-- 
Cheers,               NOT ALL ELECTRONS ARE NEGATIVE; some have just been hurt 
Rick Moen             in the past and are looking for a reason to trust again.
rick@linuxmafia.com                                      -- @SarcasticRover
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                         "On the Internet, no one knows you're a dog --
Rick Moen                       unless you type 'woof, woof, woof'."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                               -- pyellman
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                  "If you see a snake, just kill it. 
Rick Moen                                Don't appoint a committee on snakes."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                         -- H. Ross Perot
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                           (morganj): 0 is false and 1 is true, correct?
Rick Moen                         (alec_eso): 1, morganj
rick@linuxmafia.com               (morganj): bastard.
McQ! (4x80)                                     -- seen on IRC

-- 
Cheers,                                        <BombScare> i beat the internet
Rick Moen                                      <BombScare> the end guy is hard
rick@linuxmafia.com                                           -- seen on IRC
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                           WallJam7: Roses are red,
Rick Moen                                         WallJam7: violets are blue.
rick@linuxmafia.com                               WallJam7: All of my base
McQ! (4x80)                                       WallJam7: are belong to you.

-- 
Cheers,                      <blazemore> omg i love this song
Rick Moen                    <blazemore> Now playing: Unknown Artist - Track 2 
rick@linuxmafia.com                      @ 128 Kbps. (0:47/3:24) 
McQ! (4x80)                  <Javi> blazemore:  Yeah, that's a bad-ass song.

-- 
Cheers,                       He's making a database;
Rick Moen                     He's sorting it twice.
rick@linuxmafia.com           SELECT * from contacts WHERE behavior = 'nice';
McQ! (4x80)                   SQL Clause is coming to town.      -- @KarenMN 

-- 
Cheers,                  QA engineer walks into a bar.  Orders a beer.
Rick Moen                Orders 0 beers.  Orders 999999999 beers.  Orders
rick@linuxmafia.com      a lizard.  Orders -1 beers.  Orders a sfdeljknesv.
McQ! (4x80)              -- @sempf, https://www.sempf.net/post/On-Testing1.aspx

-- 
Cheers,                                       "My opinions may have changed, 
Rick Moen                                     but not the fact that I'm right."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Ashleigh Brilliant
McQ! (4x80)              

-- 
Cheers,                                      "My life has a superb cast,
Rick Moen                                    but I cannot figure out the plot."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Ashleigh Brilliant
McQ! (4x80)              

-- 
Cheers,                                "Why struggle to open a door between us,
Rick Moen                              when the whole wall is an illusion?"
rick@linuxmafia.com                                                     -- Rumi
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                    "A man is his own easiest dupe, for what he wishes
Rick Moen                  to be true he generally believes to be true."
rick@linuxmafia.com        -- Demosthenes, Third Olynthiac, sct. 19 (349 BCE)
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                              « On donne des conseils, mais on ne 
Rick Moen                            donne point la sagesse d'en profiter. »
rick@linuxmafia.com                                     -- La Rochefoucauld
McQ! (4x80)                       

-- 
Cheers,                           « Dans les champs de l'observation, le hasard
Rick Moen                         ne favorise que les esprits préparé. »
rick@linuxmafia.com                                           -- Louis Pasteur
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             Grossman's Law:  "In time of crisis, people do not rise to
Rick Moen           the occasion.  They fall to the level of their training."
rick@linuxmafia.com          http://linuxmafia.com/~rick/lexicon.html#grossman
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                       "We reject: kings, presidents and voting.
Rick Moen                     We believe in: rough consensus and running code."
rick@linuxmafia.com                    -- Dave Clark, IETF (unofficial motto)
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               You have a problem, so you decide to use Java.
Rick Moen             Now, you have a ProblemFactory() .
rick@linuxmafia.com                                        @j_c_fitz
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                        "An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose 
Rick Moen                      smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it 
rick@linuxmafia.com            makes a better soup."
McQ! (4x80)                            -- H.L. Mencken, _A Book of Burlesque_

-- 
Cheers,                       "I know there is a joke to be made with the word
Rick Moen                      asymptote, but I just can't seem to reach it."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                           -- @j_c_fitz
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                   "You can't do anything about the length of your life,
Rick Moen                 but you can do something about its width and depth."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                          -- H.L. Mencken
McQ! (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                       "No man shall have the right to fix the boundary
Rick Moen                     to the march of a nation."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                -- Charles Stewart Parnell
McQ! (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  The great Anglo-Irish politician Charles Parnell came 
hauntingly close to pulling off the successful and peaceful separation of a
united Ireland from Great Britain in the 1880s, the high Victorian Era,
under Gladstone.  If he'd succeeded, there might have been no need for 
an Easter Rising, no Anglo-Irish War, no controversial Anglo-Irish Treaty,
no partition of Ireland, and no Irish Civil War -- thus, untold death and 
suffering averted.  He was sunk by, of all things, the scandal caused by 
an extramarital affair.)


-- 
Cheers,                                       A woman's place is in the House,
Rick Moen                                     the Senate, and the White House.
rick@linuxmafia.com 
McQ! (4x80)

(Archivist's Note:  Coined before the 2016 USA general election to tease
some of my far-right friends.  The electorate did not succeed at the
above aspiration very well, but then Дональд Дж. Трамп, at this writing
still occupying the Presidency, seems to have had substantial foreign help.)



-- 
Cheers,                         "You are entitled to your own opinion, but
Rick Moen                        you are not entitled to your own facts."
rick@linuxmafia.com                       -- Daniel Patrick Moynihan
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               « Certainement qui est en droit de vous rendre absurde est
Rick Moen             endroit de vous rendre injuste. »  ("Certainly, any one 
rick@linuxmafia.com   who has the power to make you believe absurdities has the 
McQ! (4x80)           power to make you commit injustices.")       -- Voltaire 

-- 
Cheers,                "It's easier to act your way into a new way of thinking
Rick Moen              than think your way into a new way of acting."
rick@linuxmafia.com                        -- Jerry Sternin 
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               "If God dwells inside us, as some people say, I sure hope 
Rick Moen             He likes enchiladas, because that's what He's getting!"
rick@linuxmafia.com                            -- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,              "To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of 
Rick Moen            something, when you walk around.  That way, if anybody 
rick@linuxmafia.com  says 'Hey, can you give me a hand?', you can say 'Sorry,
McQ! (4x80)          got these sacks.'"      -- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

-- 
Cheers,              "I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world 
Rick Moen            without hate.  And I can picture us attacking that world,
rick@linuxmafia.com  because they'd never expect it."
McQ! (4x80)                                  -- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

-- 
Cheers,              "If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, 
Rick Moen            let 'em go, because, man, they're gone."
rick@linuxmafia.com                          -- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,             "It's funny that pirates were always going around searching
Rick Moen           for treasure, and they never realized that the real 
rick@linuxmafia.com treasure was the fond memories they were creating."
McQ! (4x80)                                   -- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

-- 
Cheers,                 "The crows seemed to be calling his name, thought Caw."
Rick Moen                                     -- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey 
rick@linuxmafia.com 
McQ! (4x80)
 
-- 
Cheers,                       "Conservatism is the idea that healthcare imposes 
Rick Moen                     a cost on society, but sick people don't."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                       -- Matthew Garrett
McQ! (4x80                   https://twitter.com/mjg59/status/818707979130191872

-- 
Cheers,                                      299792458 meters per second.  Not
Rick Moen                                    just a good idea.  It's the law.
rick@linuxmafia.com                
McQ! (4x80                        


-- 
Cheers,                          Homo in Domu Alba, qui est iratus et habet in 
Rick Moen                        artificialibus capillum:  Quod homo non sit
rick@linuxmafia.com              honesta, et est perniciosa in rei publicae.
McQ! (4x80)                           

(Archivist's Note:  The Latin is slightly incorrect for tactical reasons:
to make it parseable without too much trouble by English-speakers who've never 
studied the language formally, but recognise the word roots, as a small word 
puzzle.  The sentiment in question is commentary on the now-infamous moral and 
functional failings of a certain deplorable, one who had a ghastly effect on 
USA national politics starting in 2016, and IMO is far more amusing and less 
ranty in Latin.)


-- 
Cheers,                             Simple systems are not feasible because 
Rick Moen                           they require infinite testing.
rick@linuxmafia.com                             -- Augustine's Law Number XLII
McQ! (4x80)                           

-- 
Cheers,                                   The optimum committee has no members.
Rick Moen                                       -- Augustine's Law Number XXXI 
rick@linuxmafia.com                
McQ! (4x80)                           


-- 
Cheers,              "Like running into a burning building and trying to put the
Rick Moen             fire out by means of interpretive dance." -- Iain M. Banks
rick@linuxmafia.com   on alternative cancer treatments, after his own diagnosis
McQ! (4x80) www.theguardian.com/books/2013/jun/15/iain-banks-the-final-interview

(Archivist's note:  This great, highly creative Scottish author, one of my 
cherished favourites, was blessed not only by great poise in the face of a 
sudden terminal, metastatic gall-bladder cancer diagnosis -- he asked his 
long-time girlfriend if she'd do him the honour of being his widow -- but 
also a mordant sense of humour I can only hope to one day match.  Having heard 
his terminal diagnosis in March 2013, after some minor treatments for an 
aching back, he lived just long enough to enjoy his honeymoon and be amazed 
by a worldwide outpouring of thanks and affection, and then died three months 
later.)


-- 
Cheers,                    "I am not responsible for the structural integrity 
Rick Moen                  of the bubble you've chosen to live in."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                           -- Mike Norton
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                     « Le doute n'est pas une état bien agréable, mais
Rick Moen                   l'assurance est un état ridicule. »  ("Doubt is not 
rick@linuxmafia.com         a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd.')
McQ! (4x80)                                                       -- Voltaire 

-- 
Cheers,                                           "A recursive .sig
Rick Moen                                         Can impart wisdom and truth.
rick@linuxmafia.com                               Call proc signature()"
McQ! (4x80)                                       -- WalkingTheWalk on Slashdot

-- 
Cheers,
Rick Moen             "History is a nightmare from which I am trying to awake."
rick@linuxmafia.com                               -- Stephen Dedalus, _Ulysses_
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,               Romana:  "I don't think we should interfere."
Rick Moen             The Doctor:  "Interfere?"  Of course we should interfere.
rick@linuxmafia.com   Always do what you're best at, that's what I say."
McQ! (4x80)                              -- Doctor Who, "Nightmare of Eden"

-- 
Cheers,              "I am a member of a civilization (IAAMOAC).  Step back
Rick Moen            from anger.  Study how awful our ancestors had it, yet
rick@linuxmafia.com  they struggled to get you here.  Repay them by appreciating
McQ! (4x80)          the civilization you inherited."           -- David Brin

-- 
Cheers,                       "There are no bad regiments, only bad colonels."
Rick Moen                                       -- Napoleon Bonaparte (attr.)
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                  My favorite website is probably 
Rick Moen                                "session timed out due to inactivity"
rick@linuxmafia.com                             -- Matt Watson (@biorhythmist)
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                              "When do you see yourself in five years?"
Rick Moen                            - time traveler interview
rick@linuxmafia.com                             -- Matt Watson (@biorhythmist)
McQ! (4x80)

-- 
Cheers,                                         I could maybe do one pilate.
Rick Moen                                       -- Matt Watson (@biorhythmist)
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,                "I never quarrel with a man who buys ink by the barrel."
Rick Moen                    -- Rep. Charles B. Brownson (R-Indiana), ca. 1960
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)

(Archivist's note:  Said aphorism is one of many lazily assumed to
be one of Mark Twain's (proof that the Midwest sense of humour will
never die).  A variant rephrased as advice is sometimes misattributed to
William Greener, press aide to President Gerald Ford, as "Greener's
Law", but the attribution to Brownson is substantially older, recorded
in Irving Liebowitz's 1964 biographical volume _My Indiana_.  One source
claims Brownson aimed his remark particularly at Eugene C. Pulliam,
publisher of the _Indianapolis News_ and _Indianpolis Star_, among 
other newspaper properties, and perennial critic of Rep. Brownson.

And, hey, that there is .signature #500!  My, how this has grown.)


-- 
Cheers,                                            "He who laughs last, lasts."
Rick Moen                                                       -- Leo Rosten
rick@linuxmafia.com
McQ! (4x80)


-- 
Cheers,            You must rise or sink / You must conquer or win, 
Rick Moen          Or serve and lose. / Suffer or triumph, / Be anvil or hammer.
rick@linuxmafia.com 
McQ! (4x80)        -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Gesellige Lieder, Ein Anderes 

(Archivist's note:  This is an English translation of the concluding 
lines from one of two poetic songs Goethe wrote in 1787 for a now-lost
opera, Die Mystificierten (The Mystified), both of which he fancifully 
pretended to have translated from the Coptic language, thus their names
Kophtisches Lied (Coptic Song) and Ein Anderes (Another, as in another
Coptic song).  Long after the opera was abandoned, Goethe saved the two
songs and published them in his collection Gesellige Lieder (Convivial
Songs), in 1814.

My best guess, along with that of an actual contemporary Coptic 
scholar, is that the narrator's view, that one must be either ruthless 
oppressor or ruthlessly oppressed, is being voiced by Goethe ironically,
as the songs were part of a commentary on contemporaneous European 
politics that had turned ruthlessly transformative (particularly the
French Revolution), an approach to life Goethe very much did not share.

The line "You must be hammer or anvil" is well known to fans of 
Patrick McGoohan's unique 1960s television programme The Prisoner, as
the thematic quotation cited by the new and particularly ruthless Number
2 in the episode Hammer into Anvil.


-- 
Cheers,        There's no theorem like Bayes's Theorem, like no theorem we know.
Rick Moen      Everything about it is appealing, everything about it is a wow.
rick@linux     Let out all that a-priori feeling, you've been concealing,
mafia.com      right up to now.   -- G.E.P. Box (w/apologies to Irving Berlin)

-- 
Cheers,                          "I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; 
Rick Moen                        I am a vegetarian because I hate plants."
rick@linuxmafia.com                                    -- A. Whitney Brown
McQ! (4x80)